Is this going to pass or is he going to call it quits!

[unwanted]

My fiance and I have been having some issues lately. Well....it's mostly him that's having these issues. Evidently he's not happy and would like to move in with his brother for a week to see what life is like without me. He told me not to look at this like a bad thing. Somebody give me your take on this. I've been sitting here in limbo now for a week and a half just wondering when and if he's going to go to his brothers or if he's just going to end it. We're not fighting or anything....but the small talk is starting to get to me. I can tell there's something very different about him. He's just not himself right now and he says it's not me. He says he feels awful for having these feelings because I'm perfect for him yet he says he feels completely detached. I don't know what to do so I've just been giving him some space and hoping that he'll sort all this out in his head soon. He is the love of my life but I don't want to force him into staying with me in any way if it's not what he wants.

[Cain]

In his eyes, you aren't perfect for him otherwise he wouldn't feel the need to see if life is better without you. He's lost interest and he doesn't want to tell you that, so he is buttering you up so that you don't think the ending of the relationship was your fault. Also, know whether or not life without you involves him going out and acting single. That could be what he's missing.

[IndiReloaded]

In the words of Nat King Cole:

You can praise his eyes
And adore his hair...
But if love...ain't there... it ain't there.

[Mish]

My fiance and I have been having some issues lately. Well....it's mostly him that's having these issues. Evidently he's not happy and would like to move in with his brother for a week to see what life is like without me.

Did he tell you why he feels that way? There is always a reason.

[celestina]

He says he feels awful for having these feelings because I'm perfect for him yet he says he feels completely detached. I don't know what to do so I've just been giving him some space and hoping that he'll sort all this out in his head soon. He is the love of my life but I don't want to force him into staying with me in any way if it's not what he wants.

You're perfect for him only because he knows you will be a devoted wife because you love him a lot. He loves you too, but he probably feels he has missed, or will be missing, on all other things life has to offer. What to do... lose the perfect wife to browse for more fun, or settle with the sure thing and say goodbye to all other diversion... The dilemma every man goes through before they tie the knot.

He probably needs the time apart to think it through.

I really wish for you that this isn't the end, but note that a marriage that starts with doubt and uncertainties doesn't look too good anyway, does it. Better end it now before it gets complicated with papers and family involved, or at least postpone the wedding until things are settled and clear between you two, and until he is sure of what he wants.

[unwanted]

Thank you Celestina...just so you know. He has postponed the wedding until 2010 for various reasons. 1 being he said he has some trust issues with me. If he only knew how I feel in my heart he wouldn't have those doubts. I'm trying not to be smothering in the mean time and give him his space. He told me that breaking up isn't in the cards right now but I don't know if I beleive him. I have never thought about cheating on him nor would I. He is the love of my life. I see what you're saying though. I know I can't and don't want to try to force him into anything as far as how he feels about me and staying together. It would only hurt us more in the long run. It's just hard because I don't have anyone to talk to so I've turned to you guys. Thanks for all your advice!

[unwanted]

He has completely broken things off now and is staying with his brother until he can get the rest of his things. I'm pretty sure he's been seeing the woman that he wrote the poem about. He says he hasn't but he was there over the weekend and took pics of her and her kids. He came to pick up his motorcycle tonight and left his truck here but he made sure he took the passenger seat for the bike. I'm not stupid....he just wants to think I am or something. Anyway....just thought I would let you guys know what happened and thanks to everyone for listening and posting your replys!

[lesa]

That is horrible that he wasn't man enough to talk to you properly. Sorry you had to go through that. Most men that want to take a quick break usually have another potential woman that he is interested in and would rather take a break or breakup than cheat. Too bad he can't predict the future with her. He'll probably regret it in some way.

[celestina]

That is horrible indeed. Just don't let it shatter your smile.

[misombra]

i was just about to say it... he's ****ing somebody else.

i'm sorry. you should move on from this person. he sounds like a fool.