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Thread: my girl is having a hard time

  1. #1
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    my girl is having a hard time

    my girl is having a hard time cuz her best friend died 3 yrs ago on memorial day in iraq. and i'm in iraq right now and she's freaking out about losing me as well. everyone around her including her friends aren't helping her feel better. they tell her that thats what she gets for getting herself in that situation and that her friend signed up for it.....excuse me but NO ONE signs up to die for their country. he fought and paid too much. i dont plan on dying and they fill her head full of this crap and she's about to mentally break and her friends do nothing to comfort her or try to understand anything. they think she should just break up with me....it doesnt matter how good i treat her and how much we love each other to them. if it was them they would understand. i dont know how to help her feel better about all of this. i told her she should leave and go to her grandmothers house for a while....cuz its out of town and all but she doesnt know what to do. anyone have any ideas?

  2. #2
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    Just explain to her that in the five years of this war we've only lost 5,000 troops, most of which were accidental deaths. Explain to her that we constantly have a flow of 100,000 troops inside of Iraq at any given time. The chances of you even seeing combat even though you're in Iraq is slim.

    There's nothing you can do to make her feel better. Distance is hard. Distance with a slight chance of you being killed is even harder. She's going to have to deal with this.

  3. #3
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    Honestly, she's going to have to work this out on her own. You have more important issues to worry about.

    You know, you've posted about this before, and the fact that she is demanding so much attention and reassurance from you makes me think she is very young. How old is she, anyway?
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  4. #4
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    It's understandable that she is having a hard accepting the fact that you are in Iraq especially after she had lost a friend in the war. Also, her friends and family didn't help either, only make matter worse.

    The only thing I can suggest now is that you should try spend all of your time talking to her so she can spend less time listening to her friend's nonsense belief and discouragement.

    She seems to love you very much but she just has a lot of distractions right now. You can make her understand that she has to be calm and patient to wait for you to come back. If you keep worrying about her well-being like this, you are bound to make mistakes, and mistakes can be fatal in the war. May be this way she will understand and calm down a bit for you to focus on your work.

    Good luck,
    Hope you come back safely to your family
    Sherry needs to review the policies for advertising other relationship advice sites on LF, doesn't she?

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