What If I'm Pregnant.....?

[misombra]

how long before you finish school?

[bluesummer]

A couple of years, still. Was planning to be done by 30 (about two yrs from now).

I guess it could be done correspondence or something.

[misombra]

i say if you're not pregnant, that you take this as a warning. i'm not a mom, but i know many moms, and i know that many things get put to the side for a child, including school. my friend had to wait until her daughter was a teenager to go back to school.

i also am a believer of being able to do it on your own if you had to. yes your boyfriend is a good guy and things are going really well right now, but you never know what the future holds, and whether of not you'll be able to hold your own is important, in my opinion. but this is because my father left my mom with two kids. when people talk about my parents in the past, they say they were so happy together and looked like they'd be together for the rest of their lives.

if you are pregnant, then i would say stay in school as much as you can. go part time if you have to. it'll be easy to give it up, especially since it sounds like your boyfriend is financially able to take care of both of you.

[Charlie Boy II]

Piss on the stick! Piss on the stick!

[bluesummer]

Piss on the stick! Piss on the stick!

I think by tomorrow, if nothing happens....I probably will.

Yeah Miso, I want to get in as much school as I can if that's the case. I will cram in as many courses as humanly possible, to give myself a fighting chance. As for taking care of myself....that's not an issue. I do pretty well and have an overabundance of useless crap in my life, I could probably afford to give up a little bit I know my bf would stand by me, even if by some strange circumstance we weren't together......he's a stand up guy, and I know he would always act responsibly.

If I'm not, yeah it's definitely a warning. It's a good thing I'm getting a chance to really think about this though, so I can really put my priorities in order. It's also shown me a very wonderful side of my bf, and the now the thought of maybe one day having kids with him seems like it would be a great experience.

I'll update when I know more. Fingers crossed.

[Charlie Boy II]

Fingers crossed for what? That there's the stirrings of life in your womb or that you'll start shedding some menstrual lining soon?

[bluesummer]

The latter.

[Asparagoose]

My bf and I discussed this last night, rather calmly and maturely, and we're not coming to any conclusions until there is a definite outcome. I know that if I was, it would not affect our relationship, and he assured me of that.

Is it maybe time to start considering this, and not being so selfish about what I need? Am I thinking selfishly?

That's a great guy.

If you're not ready for a little third wheel, then it's not fair to you or for it to come into this world. I don't think you want to feel like your child was holding you back from enjoying your life in some major way. You want to be ready to have that child, and have it be a choice, not an accident. I'm a big believer in family planning. Your boyfriend sounds like a great guy, but like vashti said, it's recent and you apparently just got divorced. I think it's more important for him and his needs, to just spend some more time with one another alone for some more time before having a child. At least you know he would make a great father, because even if it's nothing, he's the type of guy who is willing to put his needs aside to be supportive and there for you. Hope it all works out well bluesummer.

[Charlie Boy II]

Talk to the stick bluesummer. The stick knows all.

[Gigabitch]

I concur. Go get the test now.

I would like to mention that I've never known anyone personally who decided that they were done doing everything they wanted to do and thought they'd might as well have a kid now. There will never be an ideal time to have a baby. If you finish school, a kid will get in the way of your career. If you set aside some years to have professional success, the kid will get in the way of the leisure you can now afford.

Kids ruin the life you have, but give you a better life in exchange. I'm one of those people who didn't finish college because I got my "MRS degree". I didn't plan it that way, but I don't regret having her, not at all.

If you are, indeed, pregnant, don't see it as the end of all things. You could still finish. Shit, my best friend just got her MBA with a little baby around. You can do this. In fact, because of the reasons Misombra pointed out, you kind of have to.

[Mish]

I think doing Uni part time even with a kid is a viable option. We're talking about two subjects per semester (6 hours a week for tutorials and lectures) and you can have a Masters degree in two years. Most of it is homework anyway. That's what I'm doing at the moment and I can still easily balance out my full time work as well as a whole range of social commitments. There are correspondence options available too ofcourse.

[misombra]

you would have a cute child.

you might want to think about enjoying your time alone together sans child right now, since you haven't been together very long.

[bluesummer]

I know we've only been together eight months, but our relationship is the most sound, stable, fulfilling and respectful one I've ever been in. We already do spend a lot of time together.....I'm really not too concernecd about this end of things. I'm not naive enough to think nothing could ever go wrong, but I also know a good relationship from a bad one.

I wanted to take the test this morning but I chickened out. I'm such a loser.

[Tiay]

I guess anticipation really is the best bit.

[DoesntMatter]

What would you name your baby?