A frustrating love...Im going to Afghanistan :-(

[frustrated_love]

Hello,

I don't know whether this type of love will sound strange to you or not, but it is true love.

I met this girl in January on the internet but not on a dating site. It was purely accidental on a forum about me going away to Afghanistan with the British Army. Anyway...we talked for a while and then feelings started developing. We now talk several times a day on the phone and we LOVE each other.
We have both loved before so we know this is true love, and even more than before. Trouble is she is scared to take that extra step to see me because then I will be more "real" and is going to hurt even more when I go to Afghanistan very soon.

We spend nights on the phone sometimes in tears because of the frustration of wanting to see each other and me going away. I have even been in touch with her family and they are great. She is smart, an excellent job, amazing amazing personality, stunning looking...she is all I want.

We have planned our lives and everything, children, moving in together etc. I know this sounds really mad - it still seems mad to us because we wonder how we can love someone so much when we have never seen face to face. She is the most amazing woman I have ever met and I love her for who she is and not her looks (although she is amazing looking), she's like no other.

I have even said I will break an arm or a leg so I don't have to go to Afghanistan but she knows I need to do this for myself. She has brought things out in me that I didn't think I had, romance, she makes me cry, I can just be myself with her.

How do we convince her to take that risk?

[vashti]

If she is so hesitant, I can't help but wonder how you know she is who she says she is. I mean, what makes you so sure she isn't some 68 year old lonely man?

I'm sorry to say, we HAVE had posters who have done this to other people. Now I am suspicious.

[frustrated_love]

I spend hours a day on the phone to her everyday.

[vashti]

OK, so it is likely she is female. ::shrug:: You still don't know much more about her.

She is obviously insecure about something. Maybe she is worried about what you will think of her appearance.

[Gigabitch]

I say hunt her down. There is no way this woman would be planning her life with you and yet be too afraid to meet in person if she were actually everything she purports herself to be.

I don't think you would be wasting your money to hire a private investigator to go and check her out. It's not her that needs convincing, it's me and Vashti.