All right Guys, Here it is...

[gsusisking]

I really need a guys opinion. How do you keep guys wanting more of you, the SAME way that guys keep girls wanting more of them? Let me elaborate: A guy will ask for a girls phone number, call her once, they may meet, they may not, but they at least talk once. Then, he doesn't call again and the girl is left TOTALLY confused. He obviously was interested, he may have even said he was, but he doesn't contact her again. Or a guy will email a girl, they'll email back and fourth for a couple weeks, then, it just stops. A month or 2 will go by, and up pops an email or a text message from Mr. Disappear-Reappear!! Usually, this re-appearing act completely excites the girl, because, well, he contacted her again. The thing is, even though this guy didn't contact her for a while, he was still VERY much on the girls mind so she is happy to hear from him. How do guys do it? Lately, a recent happening kind of inspired ME, a female (which I'm sure you already knew ; P ) to start "keeping the boys on THEIR toes" for a change. My recent story: A guy started talking to me from my myspace profile. For 2 weeks we exchanged emails, flirting back and fourth, he really wanted to meet me so I said it would be cool. The night we were supposed to meet I arrive at the [public] meeting place we agreed on, I wait 5 minutes and I call him and guess what? He informs me that he won't be able to make it!! He's stuck working!! Funny because that wasn't mentioned earlier in the day, when he called me to confirm our plans, that he'd be working!! He wasn't even at work when he called!! After hanging up, of course making sure he hears the utter annoyance in my voice, I think, ok, HE was the one to initiate, NOT the other way around!! Yet, HE was the one to stand me up after I kindly agreed to finally meet him!! The next night, I shoot him an email telling him how rude and inconsiderate it was of him to not call (I just find it hard to let most things go), and that if he didn't respond, It would be fine, that I just needed him to know. Well, he writes back an apology and asked if he could make it up to me. I tell him to let me know when he wasn't busy so we could hang out. His last email? "For sure." Well, that was almost a week ago. Was he serious in his apology? Only he, God, and maybe some of his friends know : P However, I guess the point of this post/question is to get some sort of FINAL answer to how and why guys do, well, things like I listed above. How can I turn the game on men? Say that situation were turned around. I thought about maybe, to test out this way of some men, I'd shoot him an email, asking something just so far away from flirty like, "how much does your friend charge for a tune up?"
I.E., asking him to do me a favor and get some information for me in terms of getting my car a tune up, but using nothing even remotely flirty in my question. Act as if nothing flirty even happened between us!! Like were just two people who talk as friends. Why not? Guys come back into contact with women ALL of the time nonchalantly, as if they did nothing wrong or as if they suddenly forgot that they were in fact talking to this girl a couple months back, making her think that she may be making a connection with him!! What do you think? How do you guys work? How can I turn the tables? Talk to some guy and then not talk to him until, well, until I feel like it?! How can I keep the GUYS wanting more the same way the guys keep the girls wanting more?! I figure this 'experiment' with the guy I told you about, asking him the price of a tune up at his friends auto shop, might just be enough to get him thinking, "wow, she didn't even ask how I was doing and she wasn't flirty with me like she was before." All those things US women think when a guy all of a sudden re-surfaces in our lives... I'm not trying to trick guys or be mean spirited about this, I would just like to have that 'power' like the guys do...

[TheSphinx]

How can I turn the game on men?...How can I turn the tables?...I'm not trying to trick guys or be mean spirited about this, I would just like to have that 'power' like the guys do...

I think the issue is that you are giving the "power" to the guys who have problems clearly communicating what they want or issues with going after what they want.

The above thought process seems, to me, like a terrific way to turn a relationship into a game - good if you're looking for strategic victory, bad if you're looking for fulfillment outside of "keeping him guessing."

I would suggest that you evaluate what nature of men you are settling for, and then set your aim higher.

~Sphinx

[Michael6084]

With that type of question you're asking us, you will not get an answer of "why we do this" because the guys on this forum aren't the chick magnets you speak of. The actual chick magnets won't be at a place like loveforum.net if they have an abundant supply.

Matter of fact, I think it would be safe to say that guys here would be asking the same question to girls the same way you're asking us.

I really don't like how you seem to generalize the genders. For many guys on here, they feel exactly the same way you do because *surprise* Girls do this to guys too!

What I think you should do is if a guy holds you up, move on. He doesn't need to give an apology. You may think he does and by all means it would be great if he did. But if you go on dating guys and each one isn't exactly up to par, you expect every single guy to apologize? If he holds you up once, find someone else. It's his loss even if he doesn't know that. Don't waste your time on one guy trying to "understand" why he does things. And if you consistently end up with guys like these, you'll have to re-evaluate what types of guys you look for.



P.S. MySpace is a HORRIBLE place to look for potential relationships.

[vashti]

Why did you make three threads about the same thing?

[gsusisking]

Why did you make three threads about the same thing?

What other threads are you referring to?

[Only-virgins]

the guys on this forum aren't the chick magnets you speak of. The actual chick magnets won't be at a place like loveforum.net if they have an abundant supply.

What? Speak for yourself jack ass. I'm pretty sure Grscorp isn't really short on girls and neither am I.

[miSSleepy]

How can I keep the GUYS wanting more the same way the guys keep the girls wanting more?! I figure this 'experiment' with the guy I told you about, asking him the price of a tune up at his friends auto shop, might just be enough to get him thinking, "wow, she didn't even ask how I was doing and she wasn't flirty with me like she was before."

Actually, that may not even be what enters his mind ... he'll probably take hat you say exactly as you say it. I don't think guys are that much into playing games, in general. The guys you're talking about are probably not even aware of what sort of situation they have caused for you, because it seems like you're creating the drama and letting things get the way thet are.

[Mish]

What? Speak for yourself jack ass. I'm pretty sure Grscorp isn't really short on girls and neither am I.

Yeh, what was up with that comment? Guys on here come to help those who have problems, many do because of their own personal experience and because of that exact abundance of both experience and girls.

[Mish]

What do you think? How do you guys work? How can I turn the tables? Talk to some guy and then not talk to him until, well, until I feel like it?! How can I keep the GUYS wanting more the same way the guys keep the girls wanting more?! I figure this 'experiment' with the guy I told you about, asking him the price of a tune up at his friends auto shop, might just be enough to get him thinking, "wow, she didn't even ask how I was doing and she wasn't flirty with me like she was before." All those things US women think when a guy all of a sudden re-surfaces in our lives... I'm not trying to trick guys or be mean spirited about this, I would just like to have that 'power' like the guys do...

So many questions.

First of all, just because one guy decided to stand you up, it doesn't mean all guys are like that. We don't all act with one collective mind, each person is different. I don't know what that guy was thinking. Maybe he wasn't that interested in you, maybe he though other things were more important than you, maybe he just forgot. What he did was clearly wrong. You shouldn't continue contact with him if he is wronging you.

Second, you want to have the same approaching power as guys ? Then approach guys, then you to can decide when to keep in contact with them and when not. Simple, become a hunter, start approaching. Do it for as long as the average guy and you will see this has a lot of disadvantages.