Perhaps the Ultimate "Get-to-know" Challenge

[Dark Horse]

Hey people,

Ultimate challenge I think coming up. Unfortunatly, as seems to be the way with things on this site, it'll take a while for me to set the scene...

Me: Ok, well firstly a bit of information about myself. I'm 18 at the moment, still in college in UK. I'm into computers and video games, and thus, have a bit of a reputation at college for being a bit of a nerd. I feel that the negative reputation surrounding gamers at the moment is somthing that will die when everybody else realises that really video gaming is a growing part of modern day culture. My point here is that this negative reputation unfortuatly often has a negative effect on a girl's view. As I feel may be the case here. I'm sure many readers may sympathise and understand me here. Moving on, I hold many other aspects that I would put forward as more attractible. I play guitar, practice sport, am into history, many types of music, including classical (although that is not generally appricated at my age lol), and into amateur film-production. I've had three relationships so far in my life, each one come out of being friends, and have found that once a girl gets to know me I'm fine. It's really first impressions I guess that are the problem.

Her: Ok, well here comes the tricky part then. Tiny bit about her first. She's a year younger than me, tall, excedingly attractive.. long, smooth hair... blue eyes.... (oh.. sorry.. lol ) Anyways, I came to semi-know her from a distance, after seeing her in a college show, and, to be honest, I know very little about her. Yet, since seeing her, quite a while ago now, I have been excedingly interested in her, and frequently find myself thinking about her. There's somthing about her (and really, it isn't her looks - let's just rule that out now) that really draws me to her.

What I Want: What I want at the moment is to just know more about her, and I don't want to settle for non-first-hand information. (Not that there's much of that, she dosn't have a myspace and I doubt very much if she uses AIM.) The only thing I've really heard about her is that she hangs around with some quite popular people (although I rarely see her around college actually so I don't even know where she hangs round I see her occasionally walking somewhere (????) at lunch break (and I'm no stalker ) and I don't know if or what she does outside of college socially. I certainly have never seen her outside of school outside of this show), which immediutly draws us to my section labled "Me: ". (Sorry that was a really badly written sentance, as I wrote another one in brackets in the middle of it!

The Challenge: Ok, well here it is then. Hopefully I've explained enough about what's going on lol. The challenge is getting so as I can be classed as "Friends" with her. At the moment I'm sort of seeing this as slightly impossible, but hey, where there's a will there's a young!

P.S. I hope this read has not been to taxing, I did try to liven it up a bit.

[Gigabitch]

The challenge is getting so as I can be classed as "Friends" with her.

Nooooooo. No, no, no. NOT "friends". Right now, you have an opportunity to get to know her and NOT end up in the Friend Zone. Why would you aim for it?

[Dark Horse]

Hmmm... yea I guess. Tbh, I'm not really aiming that far, I just want to get to know her a bit more and I'm not really sure how to un-abruptly do that.
Yea, sure I'd date her or somthing, I mean, that was get to know her lol and then it could go wherever it could go. I just don't really know how to get there. lol

So.....?

[okapa]

Giga's right, friends do work out sometimes but not always, so don't go for friends, meet her, find out what you want and go for it.

If you truly want to be friends, do it but you probably will want to date her so do that instead.

Good luck mate : )

[Only-virgins]

I rather be in hell than the friends zone.

[Dark Horse]

Yea, but like, how should I go about getting a date with her? If I ask her and she makes up some excuse then I'll just feel really bad and I can't really thing where it'd go from there..?

[Only-virgins]

Yea, but like, how should I go about getting a date with her? If I ask her and she makes up some excuse then I'll just feel really bad and I can't really thing where it'd go from there..?

If it is a good excuse you ask again in the future. If not and it is pretty clear that she isn't interested in you than that is called rejection..what you do than is NOTHING..you move on. It is the "risk" that everyone is always talking about when speaking of relationships.

[Dark Horse]

I just think that there must be a decent approch that would make that risk a lot less though. Maybe not..? I dunno lol.

[Gigabitch]

So what if you take a risk? Is that so terrible? You can do this.

[Mathias]

I rather be in hell than the friends zone.

Exactly.

Well, except my best friend. She's just awesome, but romantic crap with her would be bad, bad news.

[Dark Horse]

I don't think you guys get what I'm sorta asking for lol.

I'm not really sure how to go about approching her. I mean, I don't really feel ready to just randomly walk up to her and as her out. I mean, she dosn't know me at all. I guess maybe that's just the thing to do tho. I just want some sorta advice as to how to go about approching her in a non-abrupt way.

[TheSphinx]

You don't feel like approaching her and asking her out right away and she doesn't know you at all.

Why not follow the game plan you originally posted?

What I want at the moment is to just know more about her, and I don't want to settle for non-first-hand information.

There's not that much pressure involved in this, is there?

I just think that there must be a decent approch that would make that risk a lot less...

An approach that doesn't cost you anything. If you're not loading your self-esteem ship with all of the golden ego nuggets you posses and sending it into dangerous waters, what real risk is there?

If this still isn't enough, I'll turn into "GrkSphinx" for a second and post a conversation I had earlier today in Biology lab.

Sphinx: Whadya say, wild woman?
Random Cutie: Huh?
Sphinx: Are you a Biology babe, or what? I don't run around with the Chem. fems.
Random Cutie: Haha! Oh I'm a biology babe alright. You watch out!
Sphinx: Awesome! Let's form a rowdy group in lab and dominate! In and out in under thirty minutes!
Random Cutie: The professor said it would be two to three hours!
Sphinx: Well Bio hasn't seen anyone the likes of us! ::high five::
Random Cutie: Haha! What's your name, again?
Sphinx: Hi, I'm TheSphinx.

And that was it. We had a blast in lab, continued to banter and b.s. and at the end of the lab I got her contact information.

Don't get me wrong, I was shut down by a woman in another class last night, but it's great because I won't have to sit around wondering if I should talk to her or not.

Hopefully that helps you somewhat. It's hard to explain any method or manner in going about this other than the fact is that I just don't give a damn.

~Sphinx

[Kromat]

Don't get me wrong, I was shut down by a woman in another class last night, but it's great because I won't have to sit around wondering if I should talk to her or not.

Hopefully that helps you somewhat. It's hard to explain any method or manner in going about this other than the fact is that I just don't give a damn.

~Sphinx

Haha, I love this post, this is how we all should act.
Don't expect too much and just play your own game.