She gave me her phone number, is this a good sign?

[unflinching]

Hi, I am new here. It's a long story, but let's put it in a huge nutshell.

I got to know this girl via this online website. Since November, we've exchanged email only a few times and that's it. No flirting..no sexual or romantic innuendo, whatsoever... One thing I did was telling her that I would like to show her around the town that she just moved in. She used lived in the southern part of the province that my town belongs to, but 2 weeks ago, she just moved up to my town (probably within an hour away via transportation) which is not so bad in case we met up. I sincerely would like to enrich her new life in a totally new place by take her touring.

Anyways...


I emailed her on Christmas Eve, wishing her a merry
X mas, but was not received anything back at all. I was bummed. But it was understandable because a day before Christmas Eve, she told me that she was head off to this winter teaching camp. (She is a teacher and this camp thingy is very intensive.) Above all, she had no obligation to write me back.. we barely know each other



So, on New Year's day, I sent her another email, saying that I hope that year 2008 and her life in the new town will pan out.


And, today I got her email, saying that "my camp thing is extremely busy, but you can text me some time. my number is xxxxxxxxxxx. happy new year to you too "

I was very glad to be given her number though I did not asked for it. But then again, it got me thinking that she just gave her number to me because emailing me is just irritating due to her busy schedule.


What do you think? I know that we barely know each other and have been exchanging email only a few times.. but I am kinda afraid and at a loss to be honest..

Do you think I shoule text her back immediately albeit knowing she is busy? Or should I wait a day or two before making any moves? Can I even call?

[endlesslove]

Call her, guy!

"MeetWealthyBoomer . com"

[GrkScorp]

rule of thumb.. if you're a guy.. you can't call her back until the 2nd day after she gave you her number..

now, as for what kind of sign it is.. women give their number to guys for two reasons:

1. To get rid of them and make them go away.. (usually a fake number)

2. To have the guy call them (which is still a test).. they'll be turned off when you call too soon, and turned off when you call too late (soon being anywhere within 24 hours of getting her number, late being more than 3 days after getting her number)

Now, one thing that put me kind of "off" was when she said she was busy..

"Busy" is analogous to "let's just be friends".. allow me to explain:

I've had a "Nursing Student" give me her number, & a "Medical Student" give me her number.. needless to say, both were jam packed with work, and the first time we met, they were telling me how they both had their standardized exams comming up (aka. alot of studying)..

Now, I never ask for numbers.. so they offered.. and instead of accepting and jotting it down.. I just say "relax, later, i'm too lazy to write it down now".. so they keep finding ways to give me their number.. as they feel i'm about to leave.. so finally, I give them my number, and ask them to call me cell (their number shows up, and I press save).. both said "i'd love to go (talking about something conversationally relevant as an excuse for me to call them)".. and one said "call me"... NONE of them said "i'll be busy, but here's my number".. THINK ABOUT IT! these are women who are jam-packed with work, and they didn't throw the whole "i'm busy" crap my way..

So, if I was you, i'd throw some of her crap right back.. call on the 3rd day (don't be a wussy and text; CALL!) and tell her hi.. casually slip in the fact that you were so busy yesterday (but not for all 3 days, just yesterday.. to have her thinking that you COULD have called the other days, but you didn't.. and maybe this "busy" is just an excuse.. but "oh wait"! she can't call you on that because she's also guilty of throwing that crap your way)

WARNING: don't call women on their crap.. it makes them feel uncomfortable.. it's all well & dandy if you're on top of things and know exactly what's going on, but keep it to yourself.. mainly because if you make her uncomfortable, all she has to do is stop talking to you.. but secondly.. if you make her uncomfortable and she still talks to you, you give her a head's-up on making her tactics more complicated, so never give her information about how much you KNOW she's pulling on you.. keep it to yourself and let her believe she's fooling you if it means she won't feel uncomfortable.. (let her believe she's fooling you, but at the same time, don't let her feel like she can manipulate you, there's a fine line, be sure to not cross it!)

[unflinching]

hey, GRKSCRP, thank you for the elaborate advise on my current circumstance.. After and while reading your reply, I said to myself, "Wow.. it is just an online dating thing...and I am simply intending to get to know this girl via email, call or possibly face to face meeting. Do I really have to play this kinds of game??" This does not mean that I am degrading your heartful feedback on my thread, but I grew more cautious and anxious... I hope this jeremiad makes sense to you.


Back to what you mentioned, I sort of concur to your theory that girls' saying "I am busy." is one way to reple guys from them. But, as far as what I have done is concerned, we've just exchanged email and I have never insinuated that I would like to meet her and would like to get her number or whatsoever. I have been a simply
nice random guy online, dropping a line from time to time. Honestly, I am not sure as to how busy her camp is, where the camp is taking place, whom she is teaching, how often she gets online...I am simply aware that she is participitating in the camp, which keeps her swamped, according to her.


Anyways, I think I will go with what you proposed, which is in fact what I devised. Now that she says she is busy, I do not have any intention of disturbing her work, break or whatnot, by calling her and saying "Ummmm.. Hi...this is XXX. we talked online few times..remember?" HOW AWKWARD IS THAT!!!

Since the weekend is comingup, I would love to get to know her more if she has some time to email me, call me or maybe meet me. But I think I am not supposed to insinuate it at all because we barely know each other.

I think in many cases, via online they spot their potential partners, get to know them awhile and then decide to meet for real. I think she and I have not reached that point yet.

At any rate, I do respect her privacy, tight schedule and whatnot and thus will bide my time. After datings and datings, I swore not to play games with girls...but here I am again..


Any more constructive criticism on my take?

[GrkScorp]

Any more constructive criticism on my take?

Yeah.. you make me proud.. I have to say, i've VERY blown away..

You have a very good feel for what is appropriate in this situation, so i'd tell you to trust your own instincts; because everything you've said about what would be "creepy, awkward, not time yet" is totally right..

[bloodtippedrose]

I refuse to read long threads and replies at this moment in time but I must say..

Cha its a good sign if a chick gives her number, it means shes slightly interested but it means nothing more.

For instance I gave my number to a sweet cute guy i work with that asked for it last night, but hes 11yrs. older than me and has a son. I like him but a relationship with him would first be kinda gross seeing as im still considered a teenager and he'd be considered a dirty old man and second I would be jumping right into a family (which Ive never wanted kids) then Id either miss out on the awkwardness of two young people that has never been married before OR if things went bad id be breaking not only one heart but his kids and Id be toying with the kids mind. Not cool.

[Maus]

One question...

Since when is getting a number from a girl you like a bad thing?

Oh ho!

[Aidan]

I'm with Maus on this.

If it's her real number, it's good. At least she wants to be your friend. Whether she wants anything else, that's a different kettle of fish!

[bloodtippedrose]

I'm with Maus on this.

If it's her real number, it's good. At least she wants to be your friend. Whether she wants anything else, that's a different kettle of fish!

kettle of fish......

[Mathias]

rule of thumb.. if you're a guy.. you can't call her back until the 2nd day after she gave you her number..

This is not true, and it's the premise for your post.

So screw it.

[BrotherCanada]

good to get her number but you are right, feel it out until the right time comes.

[bloodtippedrose]

rule of thumb.. if you're a guy.. you can't call her back until the 2nd day after she gave you her number..

Yeah not true.. In the book "He's just not that into you" There was a guy who got a girls number and he said he'd call her the next day, waited until the weekend to call her and she said she didnt have time for that and that he was too late.

I swear chicks read that book and it gets their blood flowing. Guys should read it to find out what not to do o_O

Its flattering whenever a guy calls within 48 hours of getting a number, the rule of thumb should be dont wait any LONGER than a few days