Doubting my love

[The_K]

Hi I am new here, sorry for not saying this in the 'new here' section but I really wanted to get down to this.

I have been going out with this wonderful girl for just over 9 months and suffering doubts but the doubts aren't ordinary really.

Bout a month and a half ago we had a discussion, anyways we solved this small prob and she said to me 'as long as you tell me if you don't love me' and it set me to thinking that night if I do or don't.

I had no worry up until then but for some reason that doubt lodged in my mind. I had never doubted it until then.

Now I swear to you that I love her but when I think yes I do I always feel a stab of doubt which is so hard to fight, it makes feeling hard. When I am with her it all feels so right but when I am away from her it is hard.

When I think I may never see her again, hold hands, kiss her, make love to her, when I think about her hurt my heart breaks and I cry.

Thing is when I let the doubting go I relax and it is all so lovely.

I'd love any views from you all, it is tearing my heart apart, we get on so well and have never argued, I am lost, I don't want to leave her.

Thanks all.

[Spidy]

it's quite normal to doubt...

to citate Gigabitch:
"Guys are made up of 10% testosterone and 90% insecurity."

And as you said yourself: "When I am with her it all feels so right"

I can't take your doubt away, no one can. But i can tell you, that there is no reason to doubt. Since you love her.

[miSSleepy]

You've only been with her 9 months - that may actually be too soon for proper love. You obviously do care about her, but you seem to be expecting too much too soon of your emotions. At this stage, your relationship seems healthy enough and you care enough. Leave things to happen naturally.

[Junket]

I also used to claim I loved my girlfriend, well beyond ever telling her.

In my opinion, saying those three little words is a commitment in itself.

[The_K]

Thanks for the responses people. Me and my girlfriend called the pink elephant effect, as in the more you try not to think about it the more you do.

The more I try not to worry the more the worry gains power in my head and thus you worry about why you are worrying. I think I just need to regain my confidence.

I had stopped worrying a while ago and it was great, it is just hard when you are always worrying lol

Thanks all, anymore adive is welcome.