Age Difference

[bigdaddy]

Hi! Here's the situation: I just turned 19 and I'm i love with a girl that's 15. If you were one of my close friends, how would you react with this age difference? I know it's only 3 and a half years, but the fact here is that she is 15 and me 19. She turns 16 in April. Thanks!

[vashti]

I think the better question would be how will her *parents* react to this, or even more specifically, what are the legal matters you could be facing should you pursue this?

[Gribble]

I think it's a bad idea. Yeah, it's only 3 and half years difference, but 3 and a half years is a lifetime when you're teenagers. Find someone closer to your own age. When she's nineteen and you're in your twenties, go for it.

Otherwise I hope her big brother whoops your ass.

[bigdaddy]

Well I didn't specify the details. I know she is in love with me too. I've known her for 13 years or even more. Her parents and mine know each other, and they know we're in love, and it doesn't disturb them. So the question with the parents is fine, no problem there. What disturb me is what will my friends (who are 19 like me) will think if I bring her with us for activities ...

[Gribble]

They'll wonder why the hell you're bringing a little high school kid along.

[gartlas]

hmmmm,no brainer,dont go for it.ur friends and everyone else that hears of it will give u hell.u will be called a pervert and stuff like that,trust me dont do it,if u really love her shes worth waiting a few years for right?

[bigdaddy]

If I wait I'm scared she finds someone else. Hell I've seen worse than that, her friend is 14 and goes out with a 19 year old guy, like me, but I never had the chance to talked to him. I also know a 28-22 years difference relationship. My parents have a 11 years difference. That's why I think it's not that bad a 3 years and 6 months difference. Well all your negative answers confused me ... but thanks for your honesty.

[gartlas]

Its different the older u get.I will repeat if u love her enough ,and she loves u ,then WAIT FOR HER.if she feels strongly about u then have a word with her and ask her if she will wait for u

[bigdaddy]

How long do you think I should wait?

[Gribble]

Three years.

[bigdaddy]

Well wouldn't it be good enough if I waited until she turns 16? Three years seems too long since both of us know we love each other ...

[vashti]

This is the thing: I have a daughter, and I wouldn't allow her to date a boy three years older because I would expect a boy three years older to be much more sexually mature than she is. Psychologically, you may very well be on par, but I doubt that isthe case physically.

I really think you should talk to her father man-to-man about dating this girl. I would really be surprised if he would allow it, but I guess stranger things have happened.

[gartlas]

well,vashti I think ur wrong there.Don't talk to her father.he is likely to beat you with a pickaxe handle.I know if I had a daughter I would shoot them if they tried to talk to me about my daughter and having a relationship with her.As I said have a word with her and ask if she feels she can wait a few years for you.

who was it that said 'love endures all things' whoever it was,they were a freaking genius

[bigdaddy]

Let me put it more complicated: we know each over for over 13 years, and her parents are best friends with mine for over 30 years. The fact is that we made it "official", should I break up because of the age difference?

[vashti]

Just because your parents are friends does not mean they will approve. You really need to talk to the parents,