am i a fool?

[lovefool]

I am new for this forum and I have my reason to become a member because I need your advice of what happened to me so please help me think because I am very confused at the moment.

I have had a one year long-distance relationship with my boyfriend, we seeing each other from times to times but not as often as we wish and then we broke up in June however I knew while he was with me he went back in contact with his ex-girlfriend who lives in the same area as him. I have tried to ask for the truth many times but what i got is just lies over lies. I should be happy we broke up didn't I? but i am not. He broke up with me and until today I still can't get over him. He still keep contact with me as friend. It hurts me but I can't let go of him completely so I accept to be his friends although it hurts.

The thing is last week i talked to him openly I told him please don't lie to me again if he really want a friendship because i know everything, so he confess - he told me he has been in contact with his long time ex-girlfriend (they were together for 3 - 4 yeras) for as long as six months before we actually broke up I told him I knew he lied to me but I love him that why I stay and hope one day my love will make him change. I told him what I have done during the time we were apart, i told him I still love him regardless of what he had done to me.

After an honest talk he said he could never imagine someone will love him this much, he has never been with any girl who love him as much as I do (He broke up with me once, then we got back together, then he asked me for a break (actually he was going out with his ex that's why he needs a break with me) then we got back all because I still love him so I always forgive him) He said sorry, He is very sorry to give me such pain, He will never leave me in such pain again. His ex-girlfriend had given him a lot of problems and he wants to stop being in contact with her. He called me several times to talk, he try to make me feel love again. He promise he is coming over to see me soon.

He said his problem is that he always scare that one day his girlfriend at time will leave him so he always find someone on his side in case the girlfriend leave he still have someone there for him. However now he knows that there is someone truely love him and he will try his best to love me the way i do love him. He said he will change.

Deep down I am very happy to hear but I am scare of being hurt again, I trusted him and he abused it, he said he will do whatever to help me take that pain away and he will redeem the trust in him again. Do you think my unconditionally love will make a different? or am i such a fool to believe him again? I do love him with my heart and I wanted to believe him however I don't want to be a fool again.

I'm sorry if this is such a long post but I hope above information can give you clear view of our relationship. I am confuse and need your advice.

[vashti]

Yes, you are being a fool to believe him again. You can't make someone love you by loving them. He doesn't love you. You should just learn to accept that and move on. Why settle for such degrading circumstances? Don't you want to be with someone who DOES love you?

[seniordencio]

you know, your bf is such a lucky guy to have you as her gf. well, all i can say is that, you'd been too good to him. you'd offer her your unconditional love but the sad part is that he "never" loved you back (the way you should be). i think, you deserve to be happy.. live a happy life without him.. God bless!!

[damian5]

i'm in the same situation only im the guy. heres what my spiritual self says. give him another chance. but don't allow him to hurt you. meaning go for it but set a boundary, that he can't pass, when he does don't let it get you upset. if he doesn't meet it. leave him. make it a point not to give him another chance. but don't be hurt when he doesn't meet your standard. your only a fool if you believe to be one. you say you love him so accept his faults and move on. don't resist his faults, that only creates suffering.

[lovefool]

Thank you for every comments here. I accept him back, give him another chance and build trust and faith on him again. I may sound like such a fool but once you love someone it's not that easy to not loving. I do love him with my heart not my brain I accept that and I have to be ready for the consequence it brings too.

Once again thanks for every comments here.

[Gigabitch]

Maybe you're a fool and maybe you just need to be sure. Time will tell. I have no doubt that he will disappoint you again, and I have every hope that you will pick yourself up after that, dust yourself off, and walk away, never looking back.

[squirrley]

Giga, I dont think we'll hear from her again. But I also believe this guy is going to dupe her BAD. I know we all have to do what we think is right, but this girl is going to get burned AGAIN. Guess wish her well and talk to her again when he dumps her.

[Gigabitch]

I expect her to come back any day now. Eagerly anticipating it, actually. Ready to support her in her wrath. I hate it when the nice ones get burned.

[squirrley]

Love is blind. Whats that saying, shame on you for hurting me once but shame on me for letting it happen twice?

[Gigabitch]

I suppose you're right. Still, if someone like me could finally stop beating a dead horse and divorce a guy who never really cared, anyone can do it, you know?

[squirrley]

i did it, by choice, moved from the state to start a new life! Well worth it!

[IndiReloaded]

I suppose you're right. Still, if someone like me could finally stop beating a dead horse and divorce a guy who never really cared, anyone can do it, you know?

Ouch Gig, damn your honest 'mouth' today, lol.

Anyway, like Squirl, I think she's gone but I said it before: LDRs never work. Too little chance to imprint on each other. No bonding possible, except when a couple arranges for a definite end to the separation.

[dontknowhow]

his ex will be ex-ex, you will be the ex, his next one will be his girlfriend in near future.
but it'll probably stop somewhere, maybe it'll stop with you.