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Thread: Please Help Me, I Need Desperate Help!!!

  1. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by misombra View Post
    how can you even afford to pay for a ring like that?
    Well, beyond that...wouldn't be wiser to ask her to help pick the ring design with you? That creates a bit of a buy-in before you plunk down the money?

    Also, promise rings...desperation beyond belief! It is the down payment on the down payment for her heart. Plus, it is driven by some kind of insane belief that guys like me are deterred from hitting on a woman with a promise ring.

    Hell, engagement rings often mean nothing. I dated three women who were engaged and then broke their engagements to be with me. It means NOTHING, dude!!! LOL Like I am going to really like a woman and then think twice because she's wearing a ****ing "promise ring" ? Give me a break, man.

  2. #17
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    In fact, women with promise rings are even more likely to be vulnerable items...they get attention from another guy who is not deterred by "the ring" and they start to think twice about getting involved with you.

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    You can't send that ring. Just change the address to have it sent to you. What you're going through really does suck, but as someone else said, you sound real desperate. Don't take this the wrong way, but you're both immature. She doesn't have the guts to tell you the exact reasons for breaking up with you, she just put it in the nicest way she could. We've all been there at some point in our lives. 5 or 6 years from now when you go out into the real world and you've progressed through college, you'll be surprised by the whole situation and how you felt about it now versus how you will feel then.

    When I was 18 I was with the girl I thought I'd marry but a few years later we broke up and things had changed an absolute ton once we were in college, especially since we were at different ones. Now what you're probably thinking is "but my situation is different." That's just the thing though, it's not. Lots of people enter this situation and they all end the same way. I'm telling you though, you don't want to make the same mistake with this that a lot of people have made, myself included.

    So lets say you get her back, and then you're going long distance in college. Rather than having fun, going out, making lots of new friends, you sit in your room on the phone with her. Then finally, when one of you realizes that you're miserable, you break up. From what it sounds like, you'll be the one getting dumped in that situation and then you've thrown a year or two at school down the tubes, hardly have any friends and have to start building really late. In addition, you potentially lost 2 of the most fun years you could've had. Just let it ride and try to meet somebody new at school in a few months. You'll get over it.
    BROKEN HEARTS ARE FOR ASSHOLES.

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    or just keep it as a keepsake...?

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    Brian, there are many, many Jens in the world. You'll find another one.
    Spammer Spanker

  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by CAM View Post
    Also, promise rings...desperation beyond belief! It is the down payment on the down payment for her heart.
    I'm with Cam. Socially acceptable equivalent of a Chastity Belt, lol.

    On a side point, how many of you guys (who either are, or would consider marriage) plan to wear a wedding band? Just curious.

  7. #22
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    oh come now, the guy sent her a lot of gifts and stuff, let's not be harsh. You'd be reaching for the promise ring too if you'd already done everything else.

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    I think promise rings are inappropriate for any couple, mainly because I think they're corny and lame
    but in this situation it is particularly inappropriate

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tiay View Post
    oh come now, the guy sent her a lot of gifts and stuff, let's not be harsh. You'd be reaching for the promise ring too if you'd already done everything else.
    I don't even wear an engagement ring. Just a very plain gold wedding band. The idea of a 'promise ring' is silly.

    Lots of ladies my age are wanting anniversary diamond rings or bracelets. Personally, I'd rather put that $$$ towards a new hot tub. Guess we all have our priorities, eh?

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    eh, cheesy can be good. anyways, some girls like that stuff. just being the devils advocate.

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    Well, what i really want now, is that i am thinking about going down there and suprising her when shes at work. I understand that you guys think im stupid, and im making some big mistakes. I get that, i just want to go talk to her in person, just have a one on one chat with her, if things go rong then, then i can drop it, its just something that i really need to do for myself. Ive spent 17 years of my life just sitting around and waiting for things to happen. And i just think i want to get up off my ass, and make them happen. And i disagree with that statement, were just going to be sitting her crying ourselves to sleep every night and stuff, i dont think that is true at all. I used to do that, i used to be extremely upset everywhere i went because it reminded me of her, i would have to turn the radio off when i was driving. But now, when i hear those songs, and i go to those places, it just makes me smile, reminding me of how good she makes me feel and how many good memories we had and the ones we have to look forward to. Like the quote goes from my favorite movie, "You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can't do something themselves, they wanna tell you that you can't do it. You want something? Go get it. Period". My only question is, should i call her mom and let her mom know what i plan on doing. I am very dead set on this...

  12. #27
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    I guess I'd want to know. That way I could be sure my daughter was out of the house. (You sound a bit stalker-ish.)
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  13. #28
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    Seems to me you've already decided, G0. Good luck.

  14. #29
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    im not being stalker-ish.
    Stalker
    1. to pursue or approach prey, quarry, etc., stealthily.
    2. to walk with measured, stiff, or haughty strides: He was so angry he stalked away without saying goodbye.
    3. to proceed in a steady, deliberate, or sinister manner: Famine stalked through the nation.
    4. Obsolete. to walk or go stealthily along.
    –verb (used with object) 5. to pursue (game, a person, etc.) stealthily.
    6. to proceed through (an area) in search of prey or quarry: to stalk the woods for game.
    7. to proceed or spread through in a steady or sinister manner: Disease stalked the land.
    –noun
    i have no sinister plan, i have no bad intentions, theres nothing sneaky about what im doing, it is simply me going down there, and needing to talk to her, i just want to have a serious conversation with her, and it just cant be done to even half of its potential over the phone or on a computer.

  15. #30
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    Did I misunderstand? I thought she said she didn't want to hear from you.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

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