Whats up with that

[bigfella247]

Most of my friends tease (playfully and flirtatiously not nastily) the girls and it gets them giggling and playing about. My approach however was to treat women nicely and they'd think well of me. not to push them around, but to say nice things, compliment and help them out where they need it. I didn't think much wrong with my approach until recently. the other guys seem to be getting the results I want (girls that play and flirt with them) through different methods. what am I doing wrong? do girls not like to play around with nice boys? (if I may be so bold as to say that about myself).

[Gigabitch]

I'm a big fan of the nice boys, especially the ones who know how to flirt. See what I'm saying? Flirting is an important skill, and it can be especially effective if you come off as being sincere.

Girls like it when you initiate. You sound like you may be a bit shy. Is that the case?

[Junket]

You gotta be more than nice to chicks.

Some light teasing and joking around is usually attractive.

Guys like to call it "cock/funny".

The women 'round here don't like that term though.

[DoesntMatter]

Flirting and playing around doesn't mean that they aren't being nice. Obviously the girls like it if the guys who flirt are getting better results. I mean you said it yourself, they do it playfully and not nastily. Sounds like they too are being nice.

[bigfella247]

hmm...yes I am reasonably shy and invertibrate around this girl (I'm not usually this bad with girls). my mates know I'm really really into this girl

[jurupa]

How old are you because it sounds like your in highschool.

[bigfella247]

sure am...nearly at the end of final year (yr 12)

[investiie]

sure am...nearly at the end of final year (yr 12)

is this your first time flirting to a girl? well, i myself would prefer a guy that's not _too nice_.. some flirting won't hurt you, though.. and if a guy flirts with me, i will remember him more than the others.

[bigfella247]

well if I get into a relationship w her, it will be my first proper-super official-not a stupid schoolyard relationship. but I REALLY want to make this happen

[vashti]

Practice flirting with other girls for a while if she is too intimidating.

One thing I learned about high school girls: they want what other girls are getting. Serial flirting will increase your general appeal.

[bigfella247]

thats feels like cheating on her, even if she's not mine yet - damn this conscience of mine!

[vashti]

bigfella, you've got to lighten up a bit. I'm not telling you to ram your tongue down anyone's throat. Flirting isn't one of the seven deadly sins, you know. It's fun and makes both parties feel good about themselves.

[bigfella247]

well that previous statement was a bit of an overstatement, but I get what you mean

[vashti]

Which part was an overstatement?

[bigfella247]

the magnitude of how much it would feel like cheating on her...although I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this

the whole business becomes more and more confusing with every sentence I tie myself up with. though I'm told the harder and more confusing it is for me means that my feelings are genuine

I'm so damn wacked I began writing a strange poem
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I endure the strangest kind of sickness
because I lack the courage to tell you how I really feel
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