Ladies vs Real Women

[Breezy18]

Had to put this one up too. Boy do I relate!!!!!

Ladies vs. Real Women

Ladies - If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking,
drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an
instant "fix-me-up."

Real Women - If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too
damn bad. Please recite with me The Real Women's motto:
"I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes."


Ladies - Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on
your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

Real Women - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You
might still have the headache, but who the hell cares?


Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar
cone to prevent ice cream drips.

Real Women - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on your ass on the couch, with your feet up anyway.


Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with
the potatoes.

Real Women - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to
worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs.


Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use
a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white
powder mess on the bottom of the cake.

Real Women - Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate the
son of a bitch for you.


Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking
to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

Real Women - Sara Lee frozen freakin pie directions do not include
brushing egg whites over shit, so don't do it.



Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex
dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

Real Women - Go ask the very HOT neighbour guy to do it. (oh yeah baby! )


And finally the most important tip....
Ladies - Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice
cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

Real Women - Leftover wine?? Hello!

*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^ *^

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend
will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn...we f*cked up!!"

[squirrley]

OMG that is so funny-Ive had that emailed to me before...it still cracks me up! So true too!

[Fawn]

ROFL!!!!

I am soooo a women!!! lmao!!!

[lady_heart]

it's so funny......i am in with the real women....hahahahah

[Breezy18]

You SAID it! Real women RULE!!!
Let's hear it from the June Cleavers out there!!! *silence but for sound of crickets chirping*
I didn't think so........

[squirrley]

no june cleaver here Breezy! oh hell no-its all for himself in this house! oh yea-k I dont cook! hows that one? I do clean-but dont cook-thought of hiring Jane and Zekk as my personal chefs but couldnt afford them!

Oh and good ole Wally(kyle) does his own laundry...so whose the real woman now?(lol)

[Hopkinja]

Wait... if I do a lot of the things ladies do, does that make me gay...?

[Breezy18]

k I dont cook! hows that one? I do clean-but dont cook-thought of hiring Jane and Zekk as my personal chefs but couldnt afford them!

OMG, I don't cook either!!!! Unless you call sticking a frozen entree in the microslave cooking ! lol Some Sundays I'll do a roast or something with the trimmings, but during the week I'm just TOO damn busy and/or TIRED when I get in. But cleaning........hell yes! I'm like Monica from Friends. I hate dirt!

[squirrley]

Im laughing my ass off girl! Its about hot dogs and mac and cheese or Chef Boy-If im feeling like it I'll cook-maybe once a week like you but dont even do the roasts! Hell its more like the frozen entrees with instant potatoes...im so bad-I was freakn when Iron came here knowing hes a giant guru with nutrition-k-hide the goodies...but what that left in my cupboards...nadda! ok maybe a can of beans. My fridge I thought hed choke-bologna cheese...freezer-corndogs, french fries, and pizza! And oh the frozen tv dinners! But I didnt clean out nothing-thats who i am and am trying to change hell i have changed-thank goodness. But having a growing teen gotta have the quick stuff handy!

We had to go shopping when Iron was here-for healthy foods...but I did that today so I think Im set! but the nanas were green...way too green. Im rambling sorry!
Whose winning?

[Breezy18]

Yeah, I kinda like having the convenience foods handy too, but they are so loaded with fat and calories it's not funny. Stupid North America!!! We're all so fat over here. Theoretically speaking, of course. Seriously though, we are probably the most unhealthy continent (food consumption-wise) in the world. The UK may be in the running too though. I try (and I stress the word TRY), to keep lots of fresh fruit and vegies handy so the kids can munch on those when they get home. IF they are cleaned right away, (ie: when I get home from the grocers) then they'll be eaten. But God forbid one of the kids has to take out the celery, clean it and cut it up themselves! "Oh mum, that's just too much work!" Pahlease!!! And then they say, "can't help it mum. I'm lazy", like it's an acceptable excuse! We've switched to a lot of "whole" foods though, for health reasons. You know, the fruit instead of juice, whole wheat instead of things made from white flour. I read that if you eat a slice of white bread you might as well picture it as a slice of sugar because your body treats it the same. Not good. Anyhoooooo

Whose winning?

*thinks to self....hmmmmm is this a trick question? Does she know that Tampa is winning and just wants to rub it in????* ummmmmm, I think it's tied.

[squirrley]

Breezy I SWEAR to you im not watching the game-oh wait NOW i am-the boys are home...1-0...wahoo! WAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO tampa scores AGAIN!!!

come back game come back game

[Breezy18]

....sniff.....sniff........

[Breezy18]

&#@((*#(*@##&$(@#*@$#*%&(@*$@(#*$@&$(#*@$ What I'm thinking is too bad for even THIS forum! Crap crap crap!!!!!!

Well, we had to give you ONE game at home.

[squirrley]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHH 3-0

wahoooo now whose showing their shit hey Breezy! WELL Tampa had to win this especially going to there for the next 2 games...cant fall behind...

[squirrley]

I want to be down by those boards-damn to see someone get slammed into the boards-oh yea-smack some blood on the plastic and me yelling at them! oh my sister in law checked into tickets last week 8 bucks tonight 160 and thats for nose bleed seats-