Long term relationship gone BAD! need help... please

[AlinaBella]

hi everyone. I never thought that my relationship would get so bad- that I would need to search for help on a forum. I need some advice from those who was a little bit of experience in "commitment".
Background info:
Been with a guy for almost 5 years. I have loved him, but not anymore. He is still in love/obsessed with me.
Always had a bumpy relationship- consistently fighting and arguing.
He is extremely close to the family (works for my father).
Parents love him.

Problem:

Throughout the five years we've been together I have never been fully happy with him. And leaving him is the problem. We have always been the arguing type. I care for him a lot. He is a wonderful person, but he's not boyfriend material for me. I am not happy with him, and the search for happiness only makes me more upset. He is an amazing friend and person, always wants to help.
I constantly look for other happiness around, friends, traveling, books, movies etc. After a 5 years relationship my heart has grown cold/dead. My feelings have turned into stone. I have no f***ing idea what to do I need help.

I don’t know how to leave him, Whenever we "breakup" I start to miss him because of attachment/or he runs back all upset and heartbroken... and I take him back because I feel bad (I guess cause I care about him).

Our sex life has become a living hell! Happens once a month. The sound of his voice makes me puke. Being with him is boring, and I feel that everything he does and say's is ridiculous.

One thing I am scared of loosing is: I dont think I'll ever find someone who cares about me the way he does. I dont think that I'll be able to stay broken up with him because of pure attachment.

Please, If anyone has a couple of mins. help me out. What should I do? Its been 5 years and im terrified that this will be a problem my entire life.

Alina -

[slivil]

I know this is hard to make a decision like that, but to be honestly recently i had just broke up with my girlfriend an i had the same thought as yours. We had been togather for 1 year time, for the past few month i keep on asking myself, will i ever find someone that special in the rest of my life or it will become a living hell for my future life. And now i can tell you the answer, it surely will hurt alot when everything had come to the end. So you must think wisely before you make any decision everything maybe will become an disaster. Because every single memory moment that you both have may keep on appearing in your mind and it will never stop until your brain is not function. The shadow of him will keep on appear and hunting you. And it really hurt you so badly until you really thinking maybe just kill yourself for it. And this is my expirence for only one year relationship. I really love her very much, but only one way street i can't turn back. Hope you think wisely before you make any decision and be prepare what are you going to face in the coming day.

Wish you all the best. Good LUCk!!

[GratefulOne]

Wow, Slivil, nice response. Took the words right out of my mouth. Well done!

[Sasuke-kun]

bad situation..are you romanian ?

[SONOIL]

Н-да Алиночка... сила воли тут нужна, сила воли и абсолютно никакого контакта с ним... Интересно изъясняешься конечно тоже... Бывай сестричка...