i hate me

[thelonius]

LNF,

Your situation's almost similar to mine ... except that the problem that I have is with my own father. He never argued with me over my relationships [past or present], but he's just one heck of a control freak about the other aspects of life. Basically, the way a parent raises/teaches a child, but in his case it continued to go past adulthood. Every time that we got together [family gatherings, vacations], which doesn't occur often to begin with, he always had his issues about anything and everything, including how I should live my life. He just had to have an influence in everything that I do -- to the point that he must make the decisions for me, instead of doing it by myself. From the TV set in my living room to the automobile that I purchase [including what's in it], he just had to have things done his way or the highway. What's really troubling was the fact that he would do this all the time, even when the situation and occasion doesn't warrant it [e.g. weddings, conventions, etc.]. It's always a one way street, and in his mind he's always right, therefore anyone who opposes him is making the biggest mistake of his/her life. I had told him numerous times that the time had come for him to stop since I am no longer a child; in addition to the graduate level of education that I had attained, my prosperous career, bought a house, and now living a married life; but accused me instead for being the most despicable being he ever encountered, because I refused heed to his demands. I had told him that I appreciated his advice, but heeding it was my choice to make and not his. Well ... need I continue??

In the here and now -- I really miss my mom -- but it left me with no choice, but to sever ties with him. In the last incident, which got ugly of course, I told him that if we keep on getting in each other's nerves every time we get together, I prefer to maintain the 300+ mile distance between us. I had decided to give myself one year of silence, which started two months ago [in May]. Which meant no birthdays, no July 4th, no anniversaries, no Thanksgiving, no Christmas, etc. I am not surprised if he doesn't give a s***, and if his BS prevails, then this arrangement will continue indefinitely as well.

[thelonius]

significant other

Thank you.

[thelonius]

i don't understand why people are depressed most, or even half of the time. probably a chemical inbalance, but i don't it and...therefore i can only imagine.

raverboy

People get depressed for numerous reasons, and will do the "darn-dest" things, often with devastating results. While we may not understand what the person is really feeling or going through, unfortunately, I also feel bad about the lack [or absence] of consideration and compassion coming from others.

About 8 years ago, I witnessed a really bad incident in the Bronx, that opened my eyes to the sad reality of the cruel world that we live in. I was driving on my way home from work, and the traffic was really bad. When I found out what was causing the traffic, I decided to check it out for myself. There was a woman standing on top of the 6-story building, threatening to jump and end her life. On the scene there was a person, or two, who were trying their very best to calm her down and talk her out of what she was about to do. I thought things were going very well, until some jerk from the street started shouting the following: "Go ahead and jump. Life will go on. You won't be missed and nobody will give a damn!" It's been a long time, and I don't remember the exact words that he said, but it's somewhere along those lines.

To make a long story short ... well, you got the picture and I'll spare the details. An ambulance rushed her to a nearby hospital where she later died from her injuries. As for the jerk who shouted the above-mentioned words, I really don't know what happened to him. Surprisingly, I don't even recall that incident appearing as a headline in print media. That was a very sad day, and sometimes I wished that I had not witnessed it...

[misombra]

i'm gonna have to just stay out of this thread from now on.

[Illusional]

thelonius...haha my lack of compassion doesn't go that far, but i'm sure that it would if i were watching a movie. anyhow, i feel that people deal with their problems in their own way, but every problem that we face in this world is something that mankind should be able to handle, reguardless of the amount of depression that we think we are facing. i feel that too many times people consider themselves the victims and they feel like the world is out to get them.

take this lady for example, i'm sure that she was having a hard time in life, maybe she wasn't able to pay for her bills because she had lost of job, i dunno. but whatever the problem was, i'm sure that there was always a better way to handle it. sometimes people are either too weak or depressed (whatever it is), but they don't wanna face that facts in life. they turn to others with this, i'm so depressed feeling, probably looking for comfort, and when we try to give them support, it doesn't do anything. that's why i don't feel sorry, i give you some sympathy and it's not enough. well too bad for you then... catch my drift?? i don't hate these people, i just don't give a damn. hahaha

raverboy

[Gribble]

I don't have any sympathy. You want to kill yourself, do it. But don't ****ing stop traffic and screw up my commute, asshole. I live on an island connected by bridge, so my daily commute involves crossing said bridge twice. Some cocksucker decided to kill himself one afternoon and I had to sit out in traffic for hours only to reach the bridge and be turned away with no other means to cross. I wanted to force my way onto the bridge, find the son of a bitch, and hurl him off myself.

[anachronistic]

people that attempt to kill themselves in public just want attention.

[Illusional]

that's what i think, because if you really wanted to kill yourself, you'd do it in a place where no one could possible stop you. why do it in public you ask?? it's because of all the attention that you receive for a mere hour.

raverboy

[thelonius]

My apologies for opening a can of worms about suicide and such. However, regardless of the feelings that we have about it [negative or what not], it still ends with the senseless loss of human life. *If* [and I'm asking this in a non-thretening/non-insulting manner] the person involved happens to be someone close to you [e.g. a best friend, sibling, 1st cousin, aunt or uncle, etc.], will your principles remain unchanged?

It happened to a childhood friend of mine many years ago. He never got over the heartache that he felt over the girl that he lost, that he end up getting institutionalized for it. One week after his release from the center, he decided to put a bullet in his head in the privacy of his room. My feelings have been mixed about it, that I haven't given myself the courage to visit his grave site to this day. Perhaps, I could get some help on this [not insults please].

I will also add that we all get inconvenienced, in some form or another, but life goes on and we move on. I am fortunate to be employed in a vocation that I truly love and always look forward to when I wake up in the morning, and putting up with the traffic congestion in boroughs of the NYC area [except Staten Island] on a daily basis, is one things that I learned to just not get in the best of me. What that lady did in the Bronx was nothing compared to what I would witnessed one year later on 9/11 with the WTC. It took me over 3 hours just to get out of Manhattan ... and I lost friends there. They may not be close friends, but they're still my friends that I attended 7 funerals in one year alone. But as I said, life goes on and we move on...

[Gigabitch]

I don't have any sympathy. You want to kill yourself, do it. But don't ****ing stop traffic and screw up my commute, asshole. I live on an island connected by bridge, so my daily commute involves crossing said bridge twice. Some cocksucker decided to kill himself one afternoon and I had to sit out in traffic for hours only to reach the bridge and be turned away with no other means to cross. I wanted to force my way onto the bridge, find the son of a bitch, and hurl him off myself.

Some guy had both I-40 and I-25 shut down this morning in Albuquerque because he was threatening to jump off a bridge.

I agree that if you really want to kill yourself, you go find some privacy where nobody can stop you. I've known a number of people who have committed suicide, but I've never known anybody who had a big drama about threatening to do it.

Anybody on here ever know anybody who did this kind of thing?

[Junket]

My mother used to try to hint that she might commit suicide.

[Gigabitch]

She sounds pretty dramatic.

[Junket]

She always was, she always will be.

Seems to run in the females in my family.

[Gribble]

I wouldn't call it senseless. If you're an adult and you've reached a point where dying is preferable to living, that's your call. But don't be an attention-starved asshole.

I'd be a little more concerned if it were someone I cared about. Who wouldn't be? I fail to see your point. Should I be concerned for every single person on this planet? How concerned are you when you read in the paper that some guy got killed in DC? Not very. If that person were your father, though, that would be a different story.

[Illusional]

hrmm... that does bring about an interesting point, what if the person who i knew were trying to commit suicide. then they are STUPID... but i would feel a little more compassion towards them. i would try to stop them, but ultimately it is their choice and sometimes you have to respect that even though you don't agree with them.

gerbil does bring about an another interesting point though. there are simply too many people in the world for me to give a shit about most of them. i simply care for those people who i interact with.

raverboy