Friendship vs Crush

[Terpy]

I have a friend, lets all call her "Kate", whom I have a crush on. My other friend, lets just call him "Tom" is Kate's close friend and my friend too. There is really nothing between them (as far as I know) just they joke around like they are lovers, they dont kiss or anything.

I have decided to try my chances with Kate but their friendship is too strong for me to get enough attention, I have my own share of attention, I mean we joke the same way like the lover thing between them but on a very lesser scale. Online, she leaves whenever he leaves and talks to him non-stop. They're like inseperatable lol.

I try to keep my actions kinda secrative to Tom cause I dont wanna be seen as a jealous/jelous person who wants to destroy their friendship. Any ideas on how I can gain something? Thnx in advance people

[vashti]

It sounds to me like she is crushing on *him*. I could be wrong, though...

[anachronistic]

I have a friend, lets all call her "Kate", whom I have a crush on. My other friend, lets just call him "Tom" is Kate's close friend and my friend too. There is really nothing between them (as far as I know) just they joke around like they are lovers, they dont kiss or anything.

I have decided to try my chances with Kate but their friendship is too strong for me to get enough attention, I have my own share of attention, I mean we joke the same way like the lover thing between them but on a very lesser scale. Online, she leaves whenever he leaves and talks to him non-stop. They're like inseperatable lol.

I try to keep my actions kinda secrative to Tom cause I dont wanna be seen as a jealous/jelous person who wants to destroy their friendship. Any ideas on how I can gain something? Thnx in advance people

Look, even if you did get Kate, they'd probably still engage in that ridiculous joking manner, and wouldn't be inseperable. I wouldn't tolerate that crap.

[Terpy]

Yea I wouldnt tolerate it either, but right now I cant go, "Hey you! Stop this!" But I still dont know how to get anywhere.

[IndiReloaded]

Sounds like a mess waiting to happen. If Tom is your friend AND he has a thing for your Kate, then he will be *pissed* if you get in 'on the sly'.

Your best bet if you really dig this girl is to find out if he has a 'thing' for her or not. Ask him directly & privately. If he doesn't then you're set, if he does backoff asap, esp since it seems she returns his affections.

[Terpy]

Yes Tom and I are very good friends and he assured me that he has nothing for Kate (Turns out hes very mad for another girl), if he did I would surely back-off as a sign or respect of course, I'd rather lose a girl than a good friend.

But in turn Tom doesnt want my actions to effect their relationship (They are like best friends forever) and the joking around like that they are bf and gf still had to go on. Unfortunatly these jokes are putting me back when I talk to her online.
I say for example a flirt and she says, "No because I only love Tom xD loool " She jokes of course. I need some kind of strategy.

[vashti]

Maybe your strategy should be to avoid the jokes and be sincere when you tell her that you are interested in dating her.

[gardino]

Don't try to beat Tom, but focus on why you love Katie so much. Generate your conversation on that. This is about you and Katie, Tom is just another diffrent case