Bad Deja Vu
Here we go again. I was dating this girl previously for four years, and we were engaged before. We broke up for like 11 months and two months ago we got back together. Last time we broke up she said she cheated on me so thet's how it ended. Now two months ago my grandma passed away and she came to the funeral with her family.
Her sister-in-law pulled me aside and started telling me that the story with cheating wasn't true and that she made that up for me to break up with her... And that she realized few things after time... Later that evening she came up to me herself and apologized to me for whtever happened and said that indeed she never cheated on me and now she's changed. So we took off pretty normally again. We went out and did lot's of things together and then she said that she's really serious about us and the relationship again and want to get married. So I thought to myself, "ok" sounds like she has really changed, so I reproposed to her and we set up date for our wedding again on November of this year.
About a week passed after we got engaged and she started the old song again! Just like in the last time she start saying that I need to change, that she felt bad about us having sex again and that I should stop go have couple of drinks with my boddys (even thou I don't do it that often now!). So anyways, last Thursday she had miscarriage (This was true and i saw papers from doctor).... She blaimed me for everything and then herself and said that nothing good happens to her when she's around me, no matter how hard i tried to explained things to her she would start saying again that I'm just trying to make her look bad, and that I'm always right and she's wrong and that I need to change. So i'm so tiered of this bullshit and just came to a thought.... Why do I love her? She betrayed me so many times now and i'm still feeling something toward her. I don't know people... I had serious conversaton with her last night and asked her straught out if she loves me or not, just like the last time she said "NO" so I said it was over because it just can't continue forever! I'm so lost, it just feels like bad bad deja vu!
...The key is, being bold and gallant. She is looking for the knight on the big white Charger that she reads
about in her stupid romance novels. Remember, after she decides to keep you, she will be throwing
those books in the fireplace, where they belong, while trying to keep you warm!...
Doc. Love