lies

[anachronistic]

i am the kind of person that has a hard time forgiving lies. they really hurt my feelings, and yet, even though i tell every girl i get i go out with that it's how i am, they end up lying to me; the first girl i ever dated wasn't even interested in me, she went out with me to get my brother (whom she didn't get) and not only that, but she lied about her age and almost everything about her.

the next girl was a little better than that. she didn't really want to go out with me either. she was seeing another guy at the same time as me.

the last girl i was with (broke up about a month ago) claimed she was in love with me. we were together for 2 years. i think she was very flirty behind my back and i heard several instances of which she denied (or switched around) that her best friend made. she stopped being friends with that girl.

the worst part of the last relationship was that she made fun of me with her friends behind my back, and denied going out with me to other people (everyone knew we were going out anyways, my car was often at her house and we looked at eachother a lot)

i decided that it was all a bunch of bullshit when i saw a picture (from her german trip with the class) of her and this other girl snuggling with some guy on a bed (there were other people on the bed) there were vodka bottles laying around and it looked like everyone was drunk. i think she cheated on me. nobody will give me a straight story though. the one thing that makes me doubt it is that the guy has a girlfriend. i found though that she was drinking at another time on the trip (she lied about that)

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since then she has tried to become my friend. she came up to me at school and stuff and apologized and told me her story and stuff. i'm not sure if i should forgive her and be friends. she won't even give me a hug.

her mom let her call me before i left for ohio, and that's when she explained what happened and everything. if her mom let her call then, i don't know why she won't pick up when i call now.

i'm also angry because she is hanging out with a bunch of stupid girls now, who go to parties and smoke and drink and shit. i don't want a girl who does that. i'm not sure if she is that involved though.

if i do forgive her, it's going to be a very long time if she wants to date me again. she's gotta earn my trust back as well as everything else.

my question is this: what kind of lies SHOULD us guys put up with?

edit: the girls mom only let her call "because it was a spiritual momen for her" my mom just called and found out. i think she's just playing games with my head... as well as the girl's. she really needs to see a psychiatrist or some shit. my mom even thinks so.

[Seducer]

You shouldn't put up with any lies. It also depends on your age, younger girls lie a lot more especially about trivial things. So, if she is young and didn't realize how much her lies can hurt you but feels sorry now, it might be a good idea to forgive her and be friends.

[Lovebubble]

I would have to say - once a lier, always a lier. However, age does have a lot to do with what girls, or anyone for that matter, would lie about. But the thing is, if someone lies to you once, my thoughts is they will do it again and the things they lie about will become more significant. And can she gain your trust again. I'm thinking maybe you can gain back just a casual friendship with this girl, but I wouldn't get in too deep....time is a good thing. Oh and for your main question - the only lies I would hope for in a relationships, are those that you have to tell when your planning to pleasantly suprise your partner.

[Taryn]

"my question is this: what kind of lies SHOULD us guys put up with?"
none, lies are the most hurtful thing you can do to someone, and after you find out that someone has lied to you, it will take a year at least a year to regain even half that trust, that is if your still willing to forgive.

I've been lied to before, and no matter how hard you might try, it's impossible to ever fully trust that person again, it's always in the back of your mind.

My advice to you is, drop her, any girl that lies that much is not good for you, there will be someone else out there that's right for you

Hope that helped!

[cheeze_guy]

I agree with what everyone says that lieing is bad and shit but the truth is that everyone lies and everyone has skeletons in their closet so only u can really decide how bad the lie is to u if its drivin u nuts chances are u need a new girl!

[thefallenheart]

not everyone lies. i have never lied. i have refused to answer a question but i have never lied.

is she wanting to be friends out of guilt or because she actualy wants to be friends?