sex.. I didn't feel a thing

[and_for_what]

So yesterday I had sex for the first time.. (yes, if you remember my other threads, I am still "with" her).

Basicaly I didn't feel a thing, I couldn't really tell I was inside her tbh. I have no basis for comparison, but I don't think she's particularly loose or anything. I'd say I'm wider than average, infact I quote her "God, youre wide!". So I don't think its an issue to do with our proportions. But yet I really felt **** all.

Possible reasons are the condom, and that I was actually not very horny at all, unfortunately. I have **** all sex drive. I don't feel much recently, actually. If she gives me oral, I don't feel anything really.

It didn't used to be like that, iirc.

TBH sex seems like such an insignificant step. The first time she held my hand a couple of months ago, was WAY more exciting and relevant.

Do you think a condom takes an awful lot of sensitivity away?

Thanks dudes

[and_for_what]

Some...it's not so terribly bad, but there is a loss. Do you see color?

are you serious? Yes, I see colour, afaik...

[and_for_what]

Did she orgasm before you inserted? Because the walls of the vagina slacken after orgasm, and she wouldn't feel as "tight" afterwards.

On the other hand, it is a very real possibility that this is a sex drive issue.

erm.. I cant remember for sure, but I dont think any of her orgasms were before we had sex. Actually I'm fairly sure it wasn't.

youre right its definately atleast partly because I wasnt very horny (I was losing my erection even while we were ****ing ). If I compare how insensitive I am doing anything else, to how it used to be, I can see its a lot less now.

[and_for_what]

You might want to talk to a professional. I don't know how to fix the sex drive.

well, Dr's dont give a shit because my very very low testosterone is still, just about, withing the so-called "normal" range. Even though I have the T levels of an average 80-year-old woman, the lab says its normal, so im fine!

[Ellynn]

Performance anxiety maybe?

[and_for_what]

Performance anxiety maybe?

no, i doubt it. I feel more comfortable with her than with myself.

[Junket]

no, i doubt it. I feel more comfortable with her than with myself.

How does that make sense?

Do you ever yank yer sausage?

[and_for_what]

How does that make sense?

Do you ever yank yer sausage?

yea of course - a lot less than I used to, though. I mostly just use it to knock me out when I want to go to sleep.

[Junket]

Maybe you should quit doing that. It might decrease your sensitivity.

I agree.

Try goin' a few days to a week before having sex without ticklin' yer noodle.

Especially since you're usin' a condom, you'll want to be more sensitive.

[Sami09]

How old are you. Maybe you just were ready for sex yet.

[and_for_what]

I'm 20. I doubt my current frequency of masterbation is a problem. I used to beat it every day without fail, and I was horny as shit back then. I dont do it all that ofton at the moment. I will avoid it for a time, though.

How sensitive I am definately correlates to how horny I am, and im sure you can all relate to that. If youre not horny, theres not much pleasure to be had from physical stimulation, whatever happens.

[Junket]

Maybe she just doesn't, "do it" for ya.

[Kitti]

oh c'mon guys....

I think it has to do with your attitude towards sex. If you only do it to put yourself to sleep, then maybe it's showing in other areas?

What about fantasizing? Do you fantasize and how do you feel when that happens? If you have fantasies about something unusal, then it may be difficult for you to get turned on outside of that situation.

Just a thought.

[anachronistic]

because its your first time having sex, it isn't what you expected, so you don't think you felt anything. after a few times, you will notice when its inside and how good it feels.

and when you feel it like that for the first time, you notice that it is really easy to orgasm even if you are wearing a condom.

have her put it inside of her the first few times until you get used to it.

[Gigabitch]

That was my thought...I'll bet she's unattractive as hell, and he knows it, but she's giving him attention and he welcomes it because he doesn't get it that often.

No, I'm pretty sure this girl is so beautiful he questions himself constantly about the whole entanglement.

A_F_W, when Vashti suggested a professional, I'm pretty sure she meant a psychiatrist. I think you should consider it. There's no shame in it. I think you should explore the idea, at least.