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Thread: Question about getting tested...

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    Teezy's Avatar
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    Question about getting tested...

    ...so I think I should get tested. I never have and i'm 22/male. I think it's about time.

    But I have a big problem with needles...like ridiculous, it's not the pain it's just the fact that some outside liquid foreign matter is entering into my bloodstream via thin metal tubing...doesn't sit well in my stomach.

    I've also heard they take a q-tip and stick it up my pee-pee hole. Um, ouch. So guys, what exactly happens when you get tested?

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    About your penis - be glad you aren't a woman and won't have to submit to the forceps. A Q-tip sounds much better.

    Giving blood is not a big deal. My daughter has been doing it every 6 weeks since she was 9. I give blood to the Red Cross 3 or 4 times a year. If you don't like needles, just look away. I feels like a pinch when they put the needle in, and that is it.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  3. #3
    King Zarathu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vashti View Post
    About your penis - be glad you aren't a woman and won't have to submit to the forceps. A Q-tip sounds much better.
    Nobody cares about what women have to go through. They don't count.

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    Come on, no one here's ever been to the Clinic to get tested for STD's? There's got to be one of you out there.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Teezy View Post
    Come on, no one here's ever been to the Clinic to get tested for STD's? There's got to be one of you out there.
    I am the STD. So far, nobody has caught me yet.

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    I believe doctors don't normally use the swab unless you have reason to suspect you have a bacterial infection. Usually, they just take a blood sample.

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    I'm pretty sure that they don't stick a Q-tip up your "pee-pee hole". Allow me to giggle at your terminology. OKay, now I'm good. Doctors usually take a blood sample and a urine sample. If deemed neccesary, they will take a sample from the urethra (your pee-pee hole), and if they do use a Q-tip, it would have to be really skinny!

    Z, don't be an ass. It freaking counts! They practically pry open your vagina with a cold piece of equipment. Then they take a sample from your cervix. It's like a really rough Q-tip they scrape on there! Damn, it really hurts, especially the first time. And that's just the pap. If you get a pelvic, you get half a hand up there that probes around the walls of the uterus while pushing on your stomach. It's the most uncomfortable, unpleasant experience and you should get it done once a year.

    If that isn't enough, once we hit 40 we have to get annual mammograms. And they wonder why boobs get saggy. Gravity takes it's toll, but I'm sure squishing them paper flat once a year doesn't help out any.



    heh heh!
    Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

  8. #8
    King Zarathu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CherriBlossomGirl View Post
    I'm pretty sure that they don't stick a Q-tip up your "pee-pee hole". Allow me to giggle at your terminology. OKay, now I'm good. Doctors usually take a blood sample and a urine sample. If deemed neccesary, they will take a sample from the urethra (your pee-pee hole), and if they do use a Q-tip, it would have to be really skinny!

    Z, don't be an ass. It freaking counts! They practically pry open your vagina with a cold piece of equipment. Then they take a sample from your cervix. It's like a really rough Q-tip they scrape on there! Damn, it really hurts, especially the first time. And that's just the pap. If you get a pelvic, you get half a hand up there that probes around the walls of the uterus while pushing on your stomach. It's the most uncomfortable, unpleasant experience and you should get it done once a year.

    If that isn't enough, once we hit 40 we have to get annual mammograms. And they wonder why boobs get saggy. Gravity takes it's toll, but I'm sure squishing them paper flat once a year doesn't help out any.



    heh heh!
    If you have to get it done once a year, why don't you all just...quit bitching and get used to it? You have periods once a month (typically) and you STILL haven't gotten used to that. Bitch, bitch, bitch.

    As far as the cartoon goes...well, that's why women do not control medicine.

    Being a virus rules.

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    Quote Originally Posted by CherriBlossomGirl View Post
    I'm pretty sure that they don't stick a Q-tip up your "pee-pee hole". Allow me to giggle at your terminology. OKay, now I'm good. Doctors usually take a blood sample and a urine sample. If deemed neccesary, they will take a sample from the urethra (your pee-pee hole), and if they do use a Q-tip, it would have to be really skinny!

    Z, don't be an ass. It freaking counts! They practically pry open your vagina with a cold piece of equipment. Then they take a sample from your cervix. It's like a really rough Q-tip they scrape on there! Damn, it really hurts, especially the first time. And that's just the pap. If you get a pelvic, you get half a hand up there that probes around the walls of the uterus while pushing on your stomach. It's the most uncomfortable, unpleasant experience and you should get it done once a year.

    If that isn't enough, once we hit 40 we have to get annual mammograms. And they wonder why boobs get saggy. Gravity takes it's toll, but I'm sure squishing them paper flat once a year doesn't help out any.



    heh heh!
    Oh man. I didn't realize that's what it all entailed... I was thinking the other day that I should probably schedule an appt at some point in the near future since I've never had one, but now I think I'll keep pushing it off...

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    I was tested not two weeks ago, and it was done by a finger prick much like those diabetes(sp) tests. The blood samples now are extremely accurate to 99.6%, and the oral samples are at 99.4%. The .4 to .6% chance is that of a negative showing positive! Not the other way around. If the first test comes out positive only then do they consider further testing. Also reguarding further tests, these only show positive after approximately three months, so if you have had any intercourse within the past three months, take another one three months down the road.

    Hopefully you won't be positive and need something stuck up your "pee-pee hole." They're dreadfully uncomfortable.

    I prefer to have testing done before any physical relations with a new partner, and I make them do it also.

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    Isn't the Q-tip up the penis test for gonorrhea and chlamidya? It's not just AIDS you have to be concerned about...
    Spammer Spanker

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    You can screen for Chlamydia through Chlamydia EIA or PCR (polymerase-chain-reaction) tests. Gonorrhea can also be tested via the blood through the use of PCR.
    Last edited by protonjai; 21-11-06 at 04:22 PM.

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    Dont worry Teezy its a piece of piss! See what I did there?! PIECE OF PISS! Give it a minute you will be laughing, the penny will drop.

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    Quote Originally Posted by cheerup View Post
    Dont worry Teezy its a piece of piss! See what I did there?! PIECE OF PISS! Give it a minute you will be laughing, the penny will drop.
    I don't get it.

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    Did you let the pure humour sink in? Its such a funny joke, I dont believe you dug deep enough. Read it again but this time laugh, remember you are british and sometimes we all need to take one for the team.

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