How shall I attract the guy?

[humanolive]

there is this boy in my class with whom i often discuss assignment problems. when the teacher lectures we kind of catch each other's eyes with the staring game. we basically have our friends in the class. so we can't really talk to each other openly. but when both of our friends don't come to class i have seen that he sits with me. he doesn't bring a single pencil or paper right on that day for some reason. so he ends up asking for them from me. he even studies from my own notes before every test. i am just jolly by nature and thats why i tease him sometimes which he likes. but the problem here is that we can't talk to each other seriously. i am extremely attracted to him n wish to have a relationship with him. but how shall i do it? he's not the kind of guy who is into sexual stuff. and same thing applies to me. so i don't want to wear anything revealing to get him on the bed. i just want it to be clean and innocent. please help. i am looking for tips.

[Mathias]

Ask him out.

[humanolive]

this is the problem. i want to ask him out, but before that i have to get little intimate with him. i want to make sure that he has something for me. but how? i can't just go to him n say do u like me..we are not still in that level.

[jurupa]

Wear a clown outfit and ask him out, that way he will get the point that you want a fun non-sexual relationship.

[humanolive]

Wear a clown outfit and ask him out, that way he will get the point that you want a fun non-sexual relationship.

i had four relationships in the past...n they were all non-sexual....the boys are still my friends and they honor me for my virginity and clean approach to love.n they are still in love with me, but i have moved on. if you have serious suggestions please only then answer. i have definitely not come here to read jokes.

[jurupa]

i had four relationships in the past...n they were all non-sexual....the boys are still my friends and they honor me for my virginity. as a matter of fact, they are still in love with me, but i have moved on. if you have serious suggestions please only then answer. i have definitely not come here to read jokes.

The only to say really is to ask him out. The guy is showing the signs that he is interested in you, why he hasnt ask you out yet is beyond me. If you want him to ask you out then your going to have to turn up the flirting on him. Because its either or and not both.

Question tho, do you normally use the word boy when refering to the male gender? I am just asking becuase normally when I read/hear the word boy it usually refers to a young male and/or an inmature male or a male younger than the female or male speaking. And the fact that you have 4 guys still in love with you as friends (how the hell you pulled this off I have no idea), sounds like if you get into a relationship with this guy he be number 5 when the relationship ends. And how you can get over the 4 guys and they can't but yet be friends with them I find amazing. But I am pretty sure the 4 guys are friends with you as they want another chance with you.

[Mathias]

Yeah, you need to just ask.

The sexual part will come up along the course of things. No need to bring it up now.

[humanolive]

To Jurupa & Mathias,
yes, i want to ask him out...n yes i do try my best to include flirting when i tease him. perhaps, thats why he likes it. i just want to make the flirting a little bit more vivid. do u have any tips for that?
Oh, Jurupa you caught that word 'boy' huh? ok, for me both guy n boy are same since i am not very used to talking about male gender at home. we are all girls at home. no brother. the only man we have here is my dad. the boy i like is a sophomore at my college who is quite serious about his career and education. so i must conclude that he is not immature. n how i manage to keep those guys interested in me? its just that i picked my boyfriends very carefully. n most of them were the intellectual types who were looking for girls like me. so perhaps, thats why they are still interested in me. i am practical and thats why i have better control on myself. i think thats how i have kept moving on.

To j_r_l,
I go to college. i graduated from high school one year ago.

[jurupa]

i just want to make the flirting a little bit more vivid. do u have any tips for that?

Do things like touching him on the arm, leaning into his space, wear flirty clothes etc.

On the clothes you don't need to expose a lot of skin to be flirty. Usualy bright semi fiting to fiting clothes does the trick.

Oh, Jurupa you caught that word 'boy' huh?

Yes I did.

ok, for me both guy n boy are same since i am not very used to talking about male gender at home. we are all girls at home. no brother. the only man we have here is my dad. the boy i like is a sophomore at my college who is quite serious about his career and education. so i must conclude that he is not immature. n how i manage to keep those guys interested in me? its just that i picked my boyfriends very carefully. n most of them were the intellectual types who were looking for girls like me. so perhaps, thats why they are still interested in me. i am practical and thats why i have better control on myself. i think thats how i have kept moving on.

I think your confusing practical with being focus, being determin, and knowing what you want in life overall and know what your goals are in life. Becuase its thoses things that tend to be more appealing to both sexes.

[vashti]

Ignore these boys.

One day when you are having a good conversation with him with flirting, etc., just say to him the following in a fun and flirty way:

"What do I have to do to get you to ask me out?"

You write, " i want to ask him out, but before that i have to get little intimate with him". WTF?!?! You are supposed to be intimate AFTER you are in a relationship, so I am guessing that you do not mean *physical* intimacy, right?

[cn176]

do u have a photo?

[Mathias]

Ignore these boys.

One day when you are having a good conversation with him with flirting, etc., just say to him the following in a fun and flirty way:

"What do I have to do to get you to ask me out?"

This is a very good idea.

I'd fall for ANY girl who did this.

[humanolive]

To Vashti,
Wow, thats a real good idea...i can definitely say that to him.if mathias, a male is saying that he will fall for it, then i think it really has some huge power in it.oh another thing, no i don't want the physical intimacy. i just want it to be little bit warmer and close so that we don't feel shy with each other.thanks a bucket for the idea!

Jurupa, I liked your idea too . i think i should begin with touching game. Don't worry about sexy clothes....i am capable of seducing men even without its help. Thanks. If something clicks I will let you guys know. after all who doesn't want to know the result of the advice???

cn176, wassup with the photo thing?

[vashti]

Were a girl to say that to me, and were I attracted to her, I would follow up that question with a "When is good for you?!" However, I would expect physical intimacy at some point. I'd be really annoyed if after a few dates I find the girl just wants to talk intimately. Boy I'd be steamed.

Yeah, but aren't you the guy who was not looking for an actual relationship, only the sex?

[sudheer]

Suggest to do some boring activity toghether, like going to a museum or a searching for some rare book in a big book shop. The idea is he would come if he is interested, and being a boring activity you both would spend more time toghether and use it for bonding..

If things go well on that day (outside of classroom), there would be natural next step something great about each other that you would discover that day. Then one thing leads to another and so on..

Yeah maybe a dumb suggestion, I have had a long day