question aboot teh 1337 kitty

[King Zarathu]

Okay well I don't know who in here is an expert on cats or anything, but this isn't really a problem as much as it is just a question. When I first saved my cat--yes, saved it, these two little girls wanted that cat before I got it and they looked like they would have put makeup and ****ed up clothes on it, but I won the race--he used to sleep on my bed every night. Every single night, he would just hop on my bed and snooze. Now, he won't get near it.

I don't understand what his ****ing problem is, either. I know it's not a hygiene thing because I wash my shit regularly and I clean myself every night before I go to sleep. He still plays games with me and everything... Oh, speaking of the games... We play this game where I hide behind a corner and peek my eyes around it, and he gets all concentrated because I'll hide around the corner again, only to peek my eyes back out, etc.. Well, after a little bit he'll jump and attack my head. I did that on my bed this morning just to see what would happen, and he jumped on the bed for about a second.. then, "Oh shit! I'm on this asshole's bed!" and he got up and jumped off like he was missing out on some pussy.. (irony?)

He'll sleep on my mom's bed without a problem though, except she doesn't like it so he just sleeps downstairs now. The rest of the time, he's like an insecure human female trying to do everything in her power to get my attention, because it just so happens that she desperately needs it to survive a minute longer.


Any suggestions?

[vashti]

Any suggestions?

Quit trying to have sex with the kitty.

[King Zarathu]

Quit trying to have sex with the kitty.

And this is specifically the reason why I knew it was a bad idea to post here. Hopefully I'll get an answer worth my time.

lol hes jsut a kid so im liek guna ignore him when hes bein a kid n stuf... so0o0o ya.......

Now, I'm going to intelligently (without subtlety) create a sexual inneundo between you and your cat from a serious question you have. I am an exception to the natural rule "All humans are hypocritical to a certain degree."

[Junket]

Cats act weird man.

That's just their nature.

[Converse]

You are hilarious hahaha.

[Gigabitch]

Is he neutered? If not, and he's over a year old, this is just the beginning. He'll be acting like a little punk all day long.

[King Zarathu]

He is neutered and he is give or take 1 year old.

[Gigabitch]

Maybe he's on the 'nip.

[King Zarathu]

....

Is that like PMS except for cats?

[Gigabitch]

No, it's like PCP except for cats. My furry little miscreants got up on the high shelf in my utility closet to get at the stuff.

They'll do anything. They'd sell their furry mouse toys just for a hit.

I fully expect to find my TV gone when I get home, and both of my cats flying on 'nip.

[King Zarathu]

Ohhh catnip!!

-.-

[vashti]

..Duh...

[King Zarathu]

..Duh...

You're older than 25 and specifically not blonde.

[vashti]

You aren't blonde either. (Are you?)

[King Zarathu]

You aren't blonde either. (Are you?)

I thought that I had successfully established the fact that the "potentially hot" 14 year old in that picture was me.


For the slow: No.