Sick of it all......

[b*tch]

My bf and I have been together for 3 years now, and I am just tired of our whole relationship. We coexist in our condo that we bought last november and we have a dog together.

I swear if it weren't for that dog we wouldn't speak at all. Just a bit of info on us. I am 26 and he is 31. I am the oldest child (and therefore I enjoy having some sort of control) and I come from a happy family, his story is a bit sadder, as he was adopted, then abandoned and lived in foster care, no real parental guidance, no family support. As a result he has spent quite bit of time in jail (longest time was for 2 years) doing crap that he learned as a result of having no family influence and having to survive on his own.

I have gone to college and work in the medical field, I am fairly driven and motivated to do well. He lacks motivation and is helpless when it comes to doing things....he "just doesn't know what to do".......when it comes to a career, etc. He has been fired from 2 jobs, and has trouble finding one (he has no license). He never speaks positively about ANYTHING, it is always a bitch-fest about something every time he opens his mouth. To top it all off, he is constantly interrupting and does not listen........not in the stereotypical "men don't listen" he will ask me a question then immediately cut me off as I try to answer.

I guess I am just sick and tired of not being heard and always having to be the alpha of the house (I remodelled our kitchen, put in laminate floors, etc on my own), I take care of all of our stuff as I have a license and he is not eligible to get his back for another 4 months (he hasn't had it since we have been together).

I am to the point where I am just mean. I am so intolerant, and I have been saying things that are really cruel out of frustration. From his past he has learned how to get under people's skin........I am sure that even as I child he learned that bad attention is better than no attention at all.......and after 31 years he has it perfected. I know I am feeding it, but I can't stop myself I am just tired of it.

He isn't just a leech, he does try, but I think he lacks the capacity to really care about other people deep down. He wasn't socialized well, and it shows. I actually said to him that when he gets his license back we should think about going our seperate ways........we live like room-mates anyway, we could handle it for a few more months.....

Any advice, criticism, etc is welcome.......I have fed my fire of hate for too long that I just want out, it may not be the answer though......

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This is the story of "opposite poles attracts and later repels". wow! it took 3yrs for you to realize all his lacks and laps in your life. you were blinded before because of your love to him and atleast, at this moment you see the flaws..

Well, when you wanted to have bad times with him rather than good times with someone else, go and let him suck everything that you have... but please, love yourself first!!!

girl, you chill out and find someone you deserve and worth to be loved!

[thinker]

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This is the story of "opposite poles attracts and later repels". wow! it took 3yrs for you to realize all his lacks and laps in your life. you were blinded before because of your love to him and atleast, at this moment you see the flaws..

Well, when you wanted to have bad times with him rather than good times with someone else, go and let him suck everything that you have... but please, love yourself first!!!

girl, you chill out and find someone you deserve and worth to be loved!

Well put! Don't we all get blinded when we think we are with "the one"? We are able to put up with an ENOURMOUS amount of garbage in the quest for true love; but once we are not in the situation and have some time to clear our minds and think things through, we realize, what the hell was I doing??? Love is not like a job or a chore, but rather a mutual, equal partership, like a business (sorry, lame analogy) With you, it sounds more like a babysitting gig... I would honestly implore you to take some time to think about what really is out there... ANYBODY deserves better than that, and you really sound like a great kid... There ARE people out there who will treat you like a princess and there IS true love somewhere... but right now, like I said, you are stuck in a commitment that is going nowhere, and perhaps for the reason that it is not right. We all-to-often think that we can make anything work; WRONG!! Some things are just right, and some are wrong. All we can do is plant the seed and do our best to get it to grow; if the seed is good, it will grow and we can see it; if it is BAD however (and there are bad seeds out there) then there will be nothing; it will wither away and then we throw it out; Sounds like you are trying to get a bad seed to grow, and are so confused why it will not... It is hard to let go, especially after putting so much time and commitment into this, but I really think that is the best option. The relationship is dead, and there is nothing you can do to bring it back to life.

[b*tch]

Well put! Don't we all get blinded when we think we are with "the one"? .

JUSTIFY the thought, "LOVE IS BLIND." !!!! AWWWWWW

[b*tch]

With you, it sounds more like a babysitting gig....

Exactly! She's doing the babysitting but unpaid. Instead, the guy gain two things- her money and service. Isn't right anymore, right???!!!