paranoid, trust

[nendo]

right so am going out with someone. a like heeeer a hell of a lot

but after like 2-3 weeks i became paranoid somethign was gona go wrong(it did but i'll explain in minute). but yeh everytime she went pub or something with her friends i get paranoid something was gonna happen. to be honest i don't think its her fault at first. i think it was the fake all my other relationships have lasted a week. so maybe am expecting something to go wrong

but yeh she went pub monday and she got drunk ad kissed another guy(no excuss) then dumped me saying she wanted a casual relationship. i was to shy for her. but actualy turns out she likes how am shy and the real reason was she kissed someone. so she made it 10 times worse.

a realy do like her so i decided to give her another chance. but now everytime she goes pub and gonna be thinking is she gonna do it again. and that lot. lol av not taken a liking to her friend as she just sat hthere and let it happen. so am not liking her friends lol but thenagain am no after her friends.

just thought i'd tell u all

[vashti]

You shouldn't hold her friends responsible for this girl's behavior. They are not her babysitter.

I think you are taking a big risk with this girl on the one hand, on the other - I think you are trying to move too fast. 2-3 weeks is usually too soon to be expecting exclusivity.

[nendo]

i don't any more. lol but if i was with a friend i would of stopped him or her from kissing someone else when he/she had boy/girlfriend. its just what friends do.

and erm. yeh going out with someone gives u exclusivity. no matter how long u'v been going out. how would u like it if u was going out with someone and they randomly kissed someone. yeh erm u wouldn't like it would u. if u don't think so then thats ur problem

[rpglord]

No it is your problem. Have you ever heard of Friend With Benefits ? Maybe she just wanted that ? Not all girls ( and off course not all men ) want a serious relationship all the time.

[rpglord]

And what do you mean you are shy ? Have you had sex with this girl ? Because if not,you are NOT in a relationship at all

[vashti]

i don't any more. lol but if i was with a friend i would of stopped him or her from kissing someone else when he/she had boy/girlfriend. its just what friends do.

and erm. yeh going out with someone gives u exclusivity. no matter how long u'v been going out. how would u like it if u was going out with someone and they randomly kissed someone. yeh erm u wouldn't like it would u. if u don't think so then thats ur problem

After 2 or three weeks, there is NO WAY I would have an exclusivity arrangement with someone because I wouldn't know whether or not I liked them well enough to give up other men.

I think you are trying to artificially create something that requires TIME to develop.

Have you even asked this girl to give up other guys and told her that you are giving up other girls? I don't mean imply it by dating her more than once - I mean an actual conversation...

This girl may indeed be an attention whore who will give you trouble, but it is possible you just are trying to rush the whole relationship thing.

PS - you should keep your nose out of your friend's relationships unless you are being paid to babysit. Your interference might be appreciated when you are in your teenage years, but it isn't gonna fly when you are an adult. If your friends are behaving badly, it is better to find a higher quality friend.

[nendo]

sorry about the other day. i was in a realy bad mood. family related and not fo these boards. so am sorry people. forgive me

everything btw is fine know.

but i stil think that friends should stop friends from doing stuff like that. but thats just me.

btw i havn't asked her to give up friends. shes known her friends alot longer than she's known me and i aint the type of guy that asks poeple to give up friends. i see that as to much control. granted i will tell her if i don't trust one of her friends but i would never ask her to never see him/her again

[vashti]

Well, I'm glad things are going better for you, then.