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Thread: Confusing Break up, Help

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    4

    Confusing Break up, Help

    Hi,

    I just had a really confusing break up, and help or advice that people could give would really be appreciated.

    3 weeks ago, my bf of 2 years broke up with me, telling me that we jus didn't have that "spark", so hes not sure if he loves me. He admitted to me that we had a great relationship; we were so close, phsyically very affectionate relationship, great sex, intellectually stimulating, emotionally connected, but he just couldnt put his finger on what was wrong.

    In light of this, I really find it hard to understand why the break up happened. It would have been easier to understand if we had been fighting or not having sex or cold with each other, but that is the exact opposite of what it was.

    I guess an important piece of information is that this was both our first serious relationship (he is 23, im 20), and for him I was only like the fourth person he was ever with phsyically. I think he might want to play the field a bit, still being young.

    Any advice that can help me understand would really help out. It would also be good to hear from anyone who has broken up with someone in similar circumstances.

    Confusded

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    13
    Confusded, my breakup was similar to yours except for the fact that we DID fight gradually more and more after the first year. We sort of became repulsive of each other after the fights. About 2 weeks ago I initiated a conversation for breakup, and all terms were accepted. I am feeling regretful now because I don't know if I made a good decision either. Maybe I did. Maybe we both needed a break. Maybe we're not even meant to be. Time will tell I guess...

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    8
    possibly he just didn't feel the same way..ive been in a situation where i just didnt want to be with the person. they didnt do anything wrong..but i wanted out! i know it's horrible..but i'm sure it happens..

    and there are lots of guys out there! so go have fun

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    231
    I think your instict is right, it does seem like he's just not ready to make things permanent. Best thing to do was just talk to him, maybe it's somthing else, if you guys had a great relationship for 2 years then it's really surprising that he would end things so abruptly. Maybe he just didn't feel the way you did, if it doesn't look like he wants to work it out then I think you need to start moving on, or trying to get over him, cuz i'm sure he's already there.
    And since you know you cannot see yourself,
    so well as by reflection, I, your glass,
    will modestly discover to yourself,
    that of yourself which you yet know not of.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    1,445
    Yah, strange that he moved on so quickly without warning.

    But if he said that something is missing, I guess something is missign for him. Sad and awful to hear.

    But there are many fish in the sea!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Right behind you
    Posts
    114
    Maybe he was just acting along and he wanted to break it up without any emotional pain for you.

    "Only the Dead have seen the end of War."
    - Plato

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