forbidden love

[secrets]

..yeah..thanks guys..i am trying to sympathize with my parents because it is a shocker..and they did not expect this from me..probably because when they asked about mike..i said we were friends..which we were at the time..and also..all my life..i have been saying i will marry a macedonian boy..but than again...that was something i said because i was taught that....i want someone who loves me...and someone who i love back..
yes my dad is a very nice guy...my family is awesome...their outlook on this is just totally different from mine..that is why i choose to stay with mike...if we have to break up..i want it to happen naturally..not because it was forbidden..

again..thanks for your input guys..i really appreciate it....its a good way to vent and hear other views

[digikitten]

Keep your love, parents cant give you the love you have with him. Finally they understand, if not....belive they do

[secrets]

awwee..thanks..thats soo sweet..i will do just that.i love my parents..and they are being even more protective of me than they were before..they hesitaed before letting me sleep over at my best friends house this wednesda...im keeping mike..i was with him all day today..he came to campus with me and we spent the whole day together..its a risk that i am taking being with him..but...ive said it before..im not saying goodbye to something so wonderful in my life...the truth didnt work...lies arent good either...but i chose to lie...than give up my blessing..

[dono]

You mentioned above somewhere that you set standards, and that he doesn't meet those standards, but you still love him. May I inquire what exactly those standards are, and how he does not meet them? Maybe that's the real reason your parents do not like him, maybe they have standards too.

Or, just to throw it out there, maybe your parents see that you really like this boy and are doing this to see if you are mature enough to respect their wishes. If you have the guts and respect to say "I'll wait" in a situation where you love this guy more than anything, then they may feel that they can honestly trust you in this situation. Maybe that's all they want to see, that's what my parents have done in the past.

[secrets]

..my standards meant that they guy had to be macedonian or serbian and orthodox, and not smoke, drink, party, or swear, and all that stuff...and mike smokes...and he drinks (ok..i mean.like a drink here and there)..lol..so yeah..i was really strict on that kinda stuff...i just had these standards that i wanted my guy to be...and well..i wanted a good boy person..and mike kinda has that bad boy look..but he's such a sweethear...stupid things like that....so yeah..those were my standards...

and yeah..my parents have a standards too..macedonian..or atleast white guy..blah blah..those kinda things...but mike doesnt meet those...

[Kieran]

Would melt my son if he brought a home

[Lloyd95]

Would melt my son if he brought a home

?
____________________

[Kieran]

Sorry, didn't explain myself there.

I'd be if my son had an asian girlfriend. Just think it looks ridiculous.

Let the flame begin

[Lloyd95]

Sorry, didn't explain myself there.

I'd be if my son had an asian girlfriend. Just think it looks ridiculous.

Let the flame begin

that's cool; I hate asians myself.

[secrets]

awwee guys...lol..yeah..i know the feeling..i would probably be really upset if my son or daughter brought someone of a certain background home...but with this relationship with mike.i have learned to be more accepting...lol...i do see it in my parents perspective though..but i will learn to be more accepting of my kids choices..especially if i come from a interracial marriage myself..or since i have been in this situation...lol...i know..its a tough thing...ohh man..and the problem continues...

[vashti]

You STILL never answered my question...

[Mish]

Which country do you live in at the moment Secrets?

Also, just out of curiousity. Now that your parents have confiscated you mobile phone, transport, your job, computer and put you under house arrest, how are you still managing to see Mike?

[secrets]

ok..please ask me your question again..and i will answer..i promise..is it about the muslim origin..and no he is not of muslim origin..i know the problems between the Muslims and my people first hand, back home, and that had something to do with it..my parents brought that up too...my sisters did..and they used it against me..but its maily the skin colour that they are bothered by..well..and the whole idea of him looking *black* my parents say..anything else..??

..and i live in canada...i got my mobile phone back...and my car.my going out privileges are practically nonexistant..yeah i dont work anymore..cause mike works there..so yeah...he comes to school with me on mondays..or some mondays...whenever he can..and umm.. i stopped by his house today after school to drop of his sweater and to say hi...and i can visit him thursday mornings before school for a quick 20 minute visit or so...thats about it though..our time is very limited unless we are on campus..then we are together all day..which is nice..but its hard to get alone time...i dont like that its not a *normal* relationship..but we're coping...i feel guilty still lying and seeing him.but this is not my way of rebelling..its my way of being with someone i love...

[Prodigal]

You know, now that I think about it, I know of someone who was in a very similar situation as you. His girlfriend was Asian, and her parents did not approve of him (he was hispanic). They did everything covertly. They spent time together without her parents knowing, and believe me, it was hard. Then they got away from her parents (by going to college and moving out of the house) and now it's a lot better. The main problem is that you are living in their house... so you kinda gotta conform to their rules. Once you're out there on your own, they can't really do much to stop you.

[secrets]

i know..its gonna be hard..and im still young..but mike and i..if we last..the going out might get easier with time or age..or whatever...or not..i dont know..we will have to see.im willing to pull through this...as is he...so we will either see that its too hard and we cant do it..or its too hard, but we can do it..we'll see..yeah i thought about moving on residence next year..so we will see..i dont have a job..so i dont wanna ask my parents for money for residence...but yeah...i drive a little over an hour to school...so it might be good..and i can visit on weekends or whenever..and mike and i can play house..we will see what happens..i only hope forthe best...with my family...and my mike..

thanks for sharing other experiences...cause it makes me see insight on how other people dealt with this....and im pretty sure there are stricter and worse parents than mine...mine arent badd..they are just strict...