In need of advice

[MereSanam143]

For the past two month this guy was in love with me. We meet at work and we still work at the same place. When we first meet, he seemed like the sweetest guy I have ever meet. He would always compliment me and tell me how beautiful I am. He even enived my ex boyfriend. We hung out once or after work one day. He let me drive his prized possession, his amazing car, noone but him has ever driven his car, and he let me drive. Whenever I needed something he was always there, he was always patient with me. He would spent endless hours with me and talk to me about nothing. I realized how much this guy liked me and I dacided to go out with him. THe day I agreeded to go out with him he told me that he loves me. I asked him how did he know that, and he told me it's a strong feeling he has towards me that he cant describe.

We went out about a month and everything was perfact. With each passing day I feel more and more in love with him. I arrived at a point where I was in love with him, I loved him. But I always kept myslef at a distance emotionally from him becasue I didnt want to get hurt. When I was ready to fully be his one and only out of nowhere one day he decieded to break up with me, he told me that I had played with his feelings for the past month. I had told him how much I loved him, but nohting seemed to change his mind. I love him without a doubt in my mind and he knows that. I tried everything I could think of for him to forgive me for keeping myslef at a distance from him. I tired talking to him, didn't work. I tried to surprise him at work by getting him flowers and ballons, nothing seemed to work. Now he doenst even want to talk to me anymore.

What should I do at the point, should I try to forget him, because I know I wil probably never be able to change his mind about what he wants, but I love him to death. What do u think happened to him all of a sudden, did he truely love me and was hurt by the idea that I kept my self at a distance from him or was it that he just wanted a g/f for the moment. When we dated he treated me as if I was the queen of the world and I love him. What shuold I do to make him see that I love him? That I wanna be with him? He told me clearly that he doesn't wanna be with me, but I know there's more to that stroy. what do u think I should do?

[Tone]

did he truely love me and was hurt by the idea that I kept my self at a distance from him

Obviously not - cause if he did he would have respected your feelings and gave you time. This is just absolutely ridiculous. Guy sounds like a big jerkoff.

Move on.

[Lloyd95]

I think the guy was all aobut the conquest.

But what did you do with your previous bf? Who you were dating when you two first went out.

[TAVS]

Wolf in sheeps clothing if you ask me.

[MereSanam143]

He did respect my feelings and he did gave me time. I didn't do anything with my previous time, but my previous b/f hurt me alot and he knew that and respected that. He said we would not do anything, such as kissing, holding hands, ect. until I was fully ready to. The whole time I kept myslef at distance from him was becasue of how hurt I was by my ex and that I wanted to prove to myself this guy really did like me for me and he would give me the title of his g/f without the additional benefits of physical contact and he did until he knew that he was. Now, even though I get the feeling he cares for me, he doesn't wanna be with me. However, I can't go one second without thinking about him. His on my mind 24/7 and I don't know what to do. If such a feeling or word as "love" exists in this word, then it is my feelings towards him. I know I made the mistake of beinging my past into my present, and I apoligized to him many times for that. I admit I made a mistake, but how do I fix is the question. When he meet my friends they were easily able to tell how much he loved me, but then why did he do this. I continouslly ask myslef, but I can't find an answer, what do u think?

[Lloyd95]

What he like at work, jobwise? Conscience? aloof?

[Tone]

I agree with Lloyd, he's all about the conquest.

You always want what you can't have (case in point - look at YOURSELF now... my goodness)

Now that he can have you, he doesn't want you - he wants to look for the next challenge. I mean come on now, OPEN YOUR EYES AND THINK ABOUT IT!! This guy is CRAZY for you, you give him a chance, you start to fall for him... then after one month you've "fell" for him and he up and leaves.

*knock knock*

Anyone home up there?????

[MereSanam143]

I highly doubt that was the case, cause when he broke up with me, he was almost in tears and he told me I had no clue to how much I had hurt him, and I had no clue to how much he loves me. Later when I tried to talk to him, he told me jsut being in my presence hurts him. What the hell is that susope to make. Why is he putting himself through the pain or being alone when he knows I love him. At work he was a cool guy. He'd always ask me how I was, he'd go out of his way to just to see me, like Tone said, he was crazy for me, and now that I'm crazy for him his gone. Now at work, he won't even look my way. and he told all this friends that I never loved him, I played him, I played a game with his feelings. I did nothing of that sort, that is not true. He is he continoulsy sayin this when he knows its not true?

[funsounds]

you need to ask him what you did wrong specifically...how it made him feel...and how can you fix it specifically.

[MereSanam143]

I asked him how I can fix things and he told me there was no way to fix it.. the only thing I could do now is to let him go.. is to forget him.. but I won't do that..I won't let such an amazing guy walk out of ym life so easily..

[funsounds]

then you know what...quit trying so hard. just be his friend, give him space, don't crowd him, leave him be a little...try to make him seek you out, even. and hope that he comes around. but be prepared to simply be his friend and nothing more.

[Rosebud]

I agree just back off from him. If he has said there is nothing you can do then let it be. In all honestly if he cared for you as much as eh said he did he would not ahve left high and dry and not wanted to fix this. he would be more patient and understanding with you about this. And frankly, excited that you care about him as much as he (says)he does. Because that's not the case I still think he wanted a challenge. Just because he was in tears doesn't mean he didn't think of you as a challenge.

[MereSanam143]

I'm tryin 2 keep my distance from him.. and I tried everything i could to solve this.. but nothing worked.. i guess its just an unsolveable problem.. he said he wanted to move on and get over me.. somehow i get the feelin i provoked him to say that.. but theres nothing i can do about that.. i tried everything i could think of.. got a question for everyone out there, what does it mean when a guy tells u "don't make this any harder then it already is for me"?

[Rosebud]

It means what it says. Some people use that line for differnet reasons but basically it means it's already hard for him to break up with you don't make him feel even worse by telling him a bunch of sweet things and what not! Now I don't know if agree with him saying that or not...but that's the jist!

[funsounds]

"don't make this any harder then it already is for me"?

doesn't matter if it's a guy or girl sayin it...usually it means there's some feelings there but for whatever reason the person has decided to leave...so let the person leave. it's always harder to leave something that a part of you doesn't want to leave if that something keeps tugging at you.