Need some Ideas!

[shh!]

Tie him up Rosebud. He will want you more when he can't touch you.

[Rosebud]

lol, I like that idea shh.. I have fuzzy hand cuffs too!!

[whaywardj]

Okay. I've read the thread and have to wonder, along with Shh!, Rosebud, why it's become a matter of moment at all. But, assuming it's just a result of a new work schedule and that you're only interested in putting a little spin on things and NOT "fixing" any kind of disinterest issue, I have to say: It takes two to tango and I don't get the feeling you're doing your part to get this "Wow!" thing you want to happen, to happen.

I get more the feeling that you're play-acting at it. This idea of feeling weird about lap dancing, for example. Sure, it'd be cute to get dressed-up as a stripper and, when he comes in from work, put on a bump-and-grind tune, do a little fandango around the room, then plop into his lap in a sexy pose at the climax of the music and flash your baby blues suggestively. But if you AREN'T going to slut it out from there, all he's gonna do is peck you on the cheek, say, "That was sweet," and promptly get up to go do whatever his routine has become. You don't take it far enough.

If the idea is to get his complete attention and a killer erection, you have to GET HIS ATTENTION. Almost scare him with sides of your personality he doesn't see much of, or didn't know were there. And it's not as if you can giggle and point to them, then let them go at that, hoping that will be enough to motivate him out his fatique or routine to make him say, as you say, "Commere, baby!" You have the BECOME that personality you're displaying. Be that different person. After just one or two episodes of such REAL sensual surprise, he'll be in the position of wondering just WHO the hell's going to be in when he get's home and not be able to wait to get there to find out.

Try themes. One lady friend of mine treated me to an "Out of Africa evening" (her phrase) that blew me away. She invited me to her place to hang-out with a movie and maybe, or maybe not, spend the night. When she opened her door after I arrived and I walked in her apartment, I was in...well, Africa. Candles every-****ing where. Kalimba music coming out of her CD player. She, naked except for two scarves wrapped around her groin and breasts. Her hair all a mess, looking like an un-made bed. I opened my mouth to utter a compliment. She shushed me and and danced me into the bedroom. More candles. And a spread stretched over the posts of her bed, making a canopy. She lay on it and writhed a bit, raised her knees to her shoulders spreading her legs wide so I could see labial lips peeking out from the edges of the scarf barely covering her. Took off the scarfs and played with herself, masturbating, inserting her fingers into herself. Then undid my pants and took my roaring hard-on in her mouth briefly.

When we got to deed, none of the standard things applied. She wanted on top. She wanted it from the rear, straddling me; her back to me. She directed everything. Rather forcefully. Took my hand and fingers in hers and inserted them where she wanted them. Manuevered my head so my mouth went where she wanted it. Employed biting a little more than ordinary. In short, a completely different lay than I was accustomed to having with her.

Next time she called, of course, I drove over white-knuckled and well beyond the speed limits, hard-on tugging at my underpants even before I got there, having no idea what to expect.

Like that. Do whatever you do for REAL. Make him a little nervous with the breadth and depth your sexual prowess. And when you see him wondering where it was learned all this shit, just smile at him and offer him in no uncertain terms yet another part of your body to enjoy.

[misombra]

my boyfriend will thank you for that later hayward...

[whaywardj]

Tie him up Rosebud. He will want you more when he can't touch you.

How cum I knew you'd suggest that?

[whaywardj]

my boyfriend will thank you for that later hayward...

LOL! Enjoy.

[Lloyd95]

Let him put it in 'da pooper. Nuff said.

Oh, and don't listen to Calazviel; he'll just want him to slurp down his own man-juice.

[Chronos]

I suggest you do this...

Tiger Kiss - Quietly sneak up behind your partner making sure they do not know what you are going to do. Out of the blue, grab them and gently bite their neck. Make sure to get a few good growls in too. This will surely surprise them.

And keep doing it at odd moments, might make it a fun night one way or another.

[Only-virgins]

What is this horrible schedule? is it worse then mine?

[Mish]

Damn, girl! You are young and cute! Why does your man need you to dress up at all??! Doesn't anyone besides me have good sex without accessories anymore?

By the looks of things, it's just you and I Shh!...

I agree with the general mood here that there really shouldn't be a need for plays to turn him on

BUT

I realize that after awhile just the physical aspect of sexual intercourse becomes kinda boring... And if it's at this stage with you guys I'm not quite sure if just dressing up and doing all these goofy things will achieve the desired result... It's easy when everything is new, unknown with a slight tinge of mystery, but the physical predictability and continuous focus on the physical interaction really kill that intense emotional reaction you may remember having in the very beginning. So what you need to do i think is bring back that bit of mystery. Or better yet, find out how to add that intense passionate bit you had in the very beginning with him (Which somehow got lost along the way). The only way of reclaiming that lost ground is to study your partner... What kind of a person he is? What are his fantasies... What are his forbidden interests... What makes him instensely passionate and lustfully active... What drives his libido... (By the way, he should know all of this when it comes to you, there may need to be opened a higher level of communication between the two of you)

I agree with what Junsui mentioned before about knowing his fantasies.

When he comes back home from work, it should be an illicitly passionate experience for for the two of you, the one that he won't be able to wait to get off work for in the future. How to achieve that? Well, once you know the above it shouldn't be too much of a hustle. Each man is different, different desires, different drives... So as I asked before, how well do you know your guy?

[Tone]

WHOA Hayward that sounds AWESOME!

RoseB, I wouldn't suggest "tackling" him or w/e first thing when he gets home from work... CURL your hair - I think curly hair is sexy ^_^

If all else fails, at least you'll have me turned on ;p

[Rosebud]

Oh my goodness, I didn't expect so many replies..lol but ok Hayward, I would love to fix the problem which is why I think these things help to do that. He loves to cuddle with me and he always tells me he wants me but he never just grabs me when he wants it or little things like that. We both have fallen to routine and that is why I like to have all kinds of things that I do that surprise the hell out of him and get that "I want you" Look back. I agree Hayward that I may not take things that far but that's because I feel ackward with the whole lap dance thing for example. I mean I think it's because I'm trying to come off slutty when I do that and I have a hard time adjusting to that as I'm very laid back. I mean he has sat me on his lap and said ok I want a lap dance, and I go uh, ok and start moving a little but I have no idea how the hell to do that. I'm not a stripper so it's ackward but I'm sure if I practice it will get better. I also think because of him not giving me that "I want you" feeling I'm hesitant to do these things because I fell insecure even though if I did it it would make him get that way... did that make sense???

Ov, my bf's schedule is 7 days a week, no days off, second shift! He also works an hour away so there's more time lost just in driving. He also works anywhere from 8-10 hours a day depending on the load of work (Tier 1 automotive supplier).

Mishanya, I crave to have those feelings of when we first met back as all I had to do was kiss him and his whole body would be "excited". Now it takes more work to do that. He gets stressed due to work which ruins his libido so I like to do things to spice it up but I'm also working against insecurities from all these issues. I'm doing my best here because sex between us is great and it's often but I like having the heat before we do anything and the craving of it. He's not hard to please but I want him to say wow! damn!

I asked him today what he likes and what would get his blood boiling. I gave him options and told him to add anything he wanted. He told me I could wear lingerie or the french maid outfit as long as it was slutty looking and then give him a teasing lap dance without having sex and then make dinner naked and then afterwards restrict him so he could watch me entertain myself tll he couldn't handle it. He combined most of my ideas all into one!! lol so I'm looking for a dirty french maid outfit and some new lingerie at the moment and I'll surprise him with that down the road here but I don't think he would last past the french maid outfit let alone the whole lap dance if I did it right. He just said "we'll see". And then said it probably wouldn't happen anyways, meaning he can't see me doing all this. So that thrives me more to do it. I appreciate all your help on this. Although looking back I can't help feel as though I really do have a lot of issues to take care of but this is a start right?

[Tone]

He combined most of my ideas all into one!! lol so I'm looking for a dirty french maid outfit and some new lingerie at the moment

You are the coolest girlfriend.

[Lloyd95]

Maybe try cutting your hair?

[shh!]

...and mail the portion you cut off to Lloyd so he can drape it across his belly...