silent treatment

[lilwing89]

ok like after we get done making out it is quiet as ****. im ok with this but recently my gf has told me that she wants to talk more and we dont talk much after we make out..i just dont know what to say after i make out..you know? so it's either some of you help me think of somethings to say after we make out that would start a convo or i wont be making out as much...

help!

[TAVS]

What do you talk about before making out? Or do you go over, walk in, make out, and leave??

[lilwing89]

we dont really talk that much in person..moreover on the internet. we are trying to change that. usually right before we make out we are nudging eachother and giggling and smiling while looking into eachothers eyes.

[Tone]

Talk like you normally would, be funny, be cute, be sweet...

[whaywardj]

ok like after we get done making out it is quiet as ****. im ok with this but recently my gf has told me that she wants to talk more and we dont talk much after we make out..i just dont know what to say after i make out..you know? so it's either some of you help me think of somethings to say after we make out that would start a convo or i wont be making out as much...

help!

You mean, like, there you both are, clothes awry, all flushed and and breathing heavy after making-out, and there you are, looking at her all glassy-eyed, trying to think of something to say that doesn't begin with a kiss? Like that?

Sounds as if you might be in danger of becoming a one-trick pony to her. If you can't think of anything to say about her, her interests, her activities, or here concerns -- or yours -- she's likely to, eventually, come around to thinking you only want her for making-out.

Start taking more of an interest in her and less of an interest in her body. Ask questions...."how's (this)?"...."what's going on with (that)?"..."whatever happened to (the other)?" Every so often when you're with her, avoid places where it's easy to start making-out. Take walks in public places. Window shop. Anything BUT making-out.

[lilwing89]

we DO talk. its just after making out, i dont know what to say. neither does she. most of the time its because her mother walks in and we stop..i think. also i used to be a very shy person. over the past 3 years that has changed. its kinda like we talk more on the internet then we do in person, and im trying to change that.

[whaywardj]

Yeah, interruptions like that can be a real conversation stopper.

How about, after making-out, saying something like, "I'm happy to be with you"? That might open up a line of conversation about the things you enjoy in each other.

[lilwing89]

i have a feeling if i said that she would look at me and smile and say nothing. ill try it though. it's just you know, your mind goes blank while you are making out.

[whaywardj]

i have a feeling if i said that she would look at me and smile and say nothing. ill try it though. it's just you know, your mind goes blank while you are making out.

If that happens, then you say, "You want to know why?" Then tell her all the things about her you like. Steer away from too much "I like making-out with you" comments.

If she doesn't respond in kind on her own, ASK her why she likes being with you.

[Tone]

Compliment her, make her feel good about herself and let her know how much you like to kiss her, and hug her, and just about things you like about her.

[Asip4u]

Talk about your day or what you're planning to do during the week and normal stuff like that. You don't always have to talk about how she makes you feel and so on.

[shh!]

Why don't you two take up some sort of hobby or project together that doesn't involve making out? It will give you something constructive to do AND give you something to discuss that will be fun. Maybe cooking?

This girl is probably begininng to suspect you only want her for making out...

Talking on the internet doesn't count for real conversation, by the way. Save it for when you are in person with her.

[lilwing89]

Why don't you two take up some sort of hobby or project together that doesn't involve making out? It will give you something constructive to do AND give you something to discuss that will be fun. Maybe cooking?

This girl is probably begininng to suspect you only want her for making out...

Talking on the internet doesn't count for real conversation, by the way. Save it for when you are in person with her.

good idea shh.
we cook together sometimes. so what are some other ideas? somteimes i teach her some chords on guitar also.

she has suspected before that i only wanted her for making out(and stuff) which is totally not true. she knows now that she is also one of my best friends.

and i agree with the whole internet bullshit. im trying to talk more to her in person. last night after we stopped making out i was telling her what kind of furniture i was getting for her room and she just had this big sarcastic smile on her face, nodded her head and said "hmm.." she is a really shy person also. sometimes i really get her talking. she just didnt seem very interested in it last night.

[marie132]

we DO talk. its just after making out, i dont know what to say. neither does she. most of the time its because her mother walks in and we stop..i think. also i used to be a very shy person. over the past 3 years that has changed. its kinda like we talk more on the internet then we do in person, and im trying to change that.

tell her you love her? ask her what she wants to do next? idk ^^; well lemme think..... *thinks* maybe she feels like you, doenst know what to say, but try to say sth, anything, and it'll come naturally after a few times. like ask her if she wanna go out, or have ice cream or idk what, or watch tv... anything. if ur at a loss what to say, i suggest you say sweet stuff, like u love her etc and see how she reacts!

[xxwildchildxx]

I understand the awkwardness, it can be a tricky thing to deal with. My suggestion is to see if you can plop a movie in after making out and sort of just cuddle while watching.