Was just thinking....

[Blapp]

This has been playing on my mind for a bit, do you think that someone who is in love with someone can have a relationship with someone else...?
Hmm like for example... A guy loves a girl but they dont speak much anymore, she lives too far away etc... He now likes another girl, would he be able to have a relationship with that other girl? And if she knows about him loving another girl, how would she react?
Not too sure why this has been on my mind... but whats your opinions?

[whaywardj]

I've always found it more beneficial and less complicated to finish one thing before I began another.

I'd guess it's on your mind because you're looking for a rationale to have your cake and eat it, too.

[Blapp]

Hmm not too sure what your last comment meant tbh... But your first comment? Wise

I'm the dumb innocent girl in this situation and I talked to the guy about it, he said he could have a girlfriend and still love someone else... I mean, is it just me or is that a bit weird? I know for a fact I couldn't do that...
He then understood where I was coming from and said we could just stay friends, but I don't know why... I told him no and that it was fine. Maybe its because I really like this guy or maybe its just because I'm dumb... I dunno, I'll learn I guess.

[clynn]

sometimes it takes getting to know and spend time and allowing love to happen to let the new replace the old. However some time in between also will aid.

[eloise]

what really makes me wonder in all this is that in other cultures a man takes many wives, and this is acceptable. why shouldn't it be ok to have more than one lover? hmmm, confusing!!

[JoGorilla]

I do believe that someone can be in love with one person and be with someone else. I only say that because I am in that situation. I love and have loved this girl for quite a while. I believe that I will always love her no matter what, but I know that I can never be with her, because she has already expressed that she doesn't love me in the same sense. But, however hard it may be to accept the fact that we may never have a greater relationship than our friendship, it is okay. I can accept that she will likely be with someone else, because I want her to be happy. Sometimes, I believe that love requires us to put our own desires aside for the happiness of those we love. I have moved on to other relationships, and I'm happy to be there. But I still love this other girl. Maybe that's messed up to some people, but hey, we are happy.

[whaywardj]

Hmm not too sure what your last comment meant tbh... But your first comment? Wise

Oops. Apologies. I misread your post. I thought YOU were the one with two lovers on her mind. But, to answer you're question, no, they can't...not without short-changing one or the other. Or themselves.

[Asip4u]

Shit happens... It's screwed up in many ways but then again, how many times have you wanted someone so bad and when you finally ended up together, you didn't feel as happy as you thought you'd be? Of course there's a lot more to it.

[eloise]

i'll let you know as i'm about to find out!!

[Blapp]

Thanks for the opinions

Btw, eloise, did you find out?

[shh!]

Yes. People who have long term marriages are the best example. Do you really think that you can go through 20, 30, 40, 50 years with the same person and never feel a deep connection to someone else?

Now, whether or not one might be willing to ACT upon that connection is another question.

[Only-virgins]

I've always found it more beneficial and less complicated to finish one thing before I began another.

Sounds like you are suffering from the same problem as me. I can't multi-task either lol. Girls are better at it. I missed an opportunity with a girl yesterday...I should have talked to her because she was looking at me and smilling but I was eating ...so no...she must wait till task one(eating) is complete...she was gone by then

[Ellynn]

I have had feelings for other guys while dating a guy. Doesn't mean the feelings were always mutual / I never acted on them at the time. You really can't control how you feel and if you feel an attraction to someone. You can control what you choose to do about it though.

[Tone]

I missed an opportunity with a girl yesterday...I should have talked to her because she was looking at me and smilling but I was eating ...so no...she must wait till task one(eating) is complete...she was gone by then

haha, been there man. The thing that makes me mad is I don't even really think about it 'til after the opportunity has passed. Workin on that though!

[Only-virgins]

The thing that makes me mad is I don't even really think about it 'til after the opportunity has passed. Workin on that though!

Same here. 5 hours after that happend I was sitting somewere and it hit me "Doh!".