How to tell a difficult truth to my famlly without losing them

[howtotell]

My parents are gone and so is my husband. I'm a widow at 61 so I have 2 adult kids and sisters/bros in law with their kids. That's what my family is and needless to say, it is critical to stay close even though everyone lives out of town except my adult son.


I had dated someone for 2 years who they all really liked and thought I could build a future with; and so did I until I realized he was too "attached" to his old house 80 miles away and didn't want to sell until retirement (about 3 years from now). I work full time like him, so I broke up and was very disappointed. My sisters and son have been telling me to wait for him to come back but I know that's a waste of time.


I went on a dating site and reconnected with a prior bf - we had been on and off but he has really worked out his life out so he is in a good place (which is why I broke up with him). However, he did serve time 12 yrs. ago but has rebuilt his life, gotten a new career, etc. He certainly isn't well off like my prior bf nor does he has a good nest egg like me, but we really missed each other and I have fallen back in love with him; I know he has always loved me and my kids.


I'm not living him yet b/c I want to make sure the "changes" are for real but in Sept. I'm renting a beach house for me and my kids. Before I broke up with the prior bf, I invited my sister and her husband to stay a few days. I hid my relationship with him from my sisters b/c they live far away and I wanted to see how it worked out before "taking a chance".


I know my sister and husband are very judgmental, so how do I break the news? I'm afraid they won't come and won't talk to me. I understand they will be freaked out about his past and if he is using me for $, but I know the truth is different.

[breathe123]

Have him meet them in person first so they can do a proper judging of him if they need to after actually meeting him, is worse to judge another if never met them, imo. Maybe do it when you rent the beach house.
No one is perfect, none of them either so they had best be perfect before judging another and since they cannot be perfect, they should withhold judgment until there is something legit to comment on & judge. His feelings for you will shine through, as will yours for him & they all should see that love between you both.

[Hooo!]

Just be honest

If your friends can't stomach what you choose then they are not your friends anyhow