Help for my broken heart PLEASE!!!

[Dearprudence]

Here is the link to my original post: http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/102913-moving-dating.html

Well, this weekend happened and he moved out all of his belongings. He (surprisingly) left a few of his personal belongings at my house and we made an agreement to meet up tonight at my house. (We are also going away together this weekend for his birthday). We have talked on the phone a few times yesterday and once already this morning. I am trying my best to adjust to this new way of living, but I am really, really struggling. He promised me again last night that this is a "temporary" situation and that he loves me, etc.

I am trying to keep myself busy, but does anyone have any advice to help me cope with being away from him? I don't want to spend my time just counting down the minutes until the next time I see him. PLEASE HELP ME WITH MY BREAKING HEART!!!!

[Oldgal]

Although you need to be separated for 365 days before you can file for divorce you can make your separation formal and divide assets etc so that when the year elapses the only step left to take is the application for divorce. Sounds to me that they may have just been taking a break to figure out if they want to give the marriage another shot or divorce.

I know this may hurt to hear but its always risky getting involved with someone who is separated - especially if they arent actively defining what the separation means and preparing for divorce.

In any case its too late to say shoulda, coulda, wouldas at this point. You can decide to wait but you really need to think about if its worth it for YOU. Is he worth the wait? Dont think about this from an emotional perspective. Think about who you are, what you have to offer and what he brings to the table. Logically, is this indefinite wait worth it? Or is it better for you to move on? Only you can really answer that question. You dont need to have a clear cut solution either. You could decide to wait 2 months and re-asses. In the mean whatever you decide you can take time to work on yourself and learn to be happy alone with your own company.

Hoep this helps...

[Hooo!]

I have given you the two choices
You can still tell him he is an ass and that he is stupid to not be with you

I somehow start to doubt this hole situation. Either he is indeed stupid or there is a motive you have not uncovered.

[Dearprudence]

What would be other possible motives?

- - - Updated - - -

Thank you for your advice...all very good, sound ideas. I just have to get my heart and brain inline with each other. As of right now, I am going to wait it out and re-assess (i.e., see how things are going before I make any real decision either way). Thanks again!

[Hooo!]

It’s useless to debate the whole thing
You are not gonna change your actions or your viewpoint. That will give him no reason to do the same At this point in time.

If you want things to change now
You have to do something
If you don’t then you can just lean back
Enjoy the ride and see what happens next.