Should I tell him?

[Caramelpopcorn]

We’ve been together for 6 months, we’ve talked about marriage, kids, buying a house, traveling together but we haven’t exchanged I love yous yet. He has only been in serious relationships and he’s kind of shy.

We seem committed and happy but that love declaration missing does worry me, cause no matter how good things can be at times, I can’t be 100% sure he loves me. I’ve been in relationships where I over estimated how the guy feels and I was wrong. I was heartbroken.

Should I just tell him? I’m afraid if I do when he isn’t there yet, scaring him and changing the dynamic of the relationship? He isn’t really good with words either so it’s not too easy to figure this out.

[Hooo!]

Do you love him?
Does that change wether he responds or no?
Does he know wether you love him?

[Caramelpopcorn]

I love him. I would hope even if he doesn’t respond it wouldn’t upset me or affect me, but I don’t think anyone can say this and mean it 100%.
I don’t know if he knows, I try to show it. My close friends think he has no idea.

[Hooo!]

If you have this problem repeatedly that suggests that you do not talk enough and together about what you want your future to be like.
Also if you don't know where he stands or what he feels you are not only bad at paying attention to the emotional state of your partner you are also not giving away anything about your own or discussing this verbally or generally

I think a relationship may work without this.
Mine however could not work without this

[Caramelpopcorn]

What do you suggest I do about this? Just be honest and blunt and tell him? This is the first time in my life that I have hid my feelings with a man, I’m usually so expressive and I never had a problem saying I love you first, but him being shy and not the most expressive person has kinda made me more hesitant about declaring my feelings.

I find it so hard to ask a man to commit to me. I feel like he should want to himself, not be pressured by me.

[donnajean]

Communication is a key factor in any relationship. Maybe find a time for the two of you to talk seriously about your relationship. Let him know where you are and what you are looking for, which I assume is marriage and children. If he is not on the same page, find out now before putting more time and energy into a relationship that is going nowhere.

I would rather tell someone how I feel and find out if they feel the same than to drive myself crazy trying to be a mind reader. Be prepared if his response is not what you want to here, however.

Big Love.

[Snow White]

I'm reading your post and shaking my head. It doesn't make any sense to me. Saying "I love you" to me is one of the most basic and sincere statements to make in a relationship. I don't understand how a couple could discuss such serious topics as marriage and having children but yet have never told each other they love each other.

If you love him, why wouldn't you tell him? If he didn't love you, why would he be discussing marriage and children with you? The best things in life are always worth taking a chance for.

[Caramelpopcorn]

I really wish it was that simple. If it was up to just me I would have told him since day one that I felt it. I felt it two months into it. But he’s a complicated guy, he’s sorta shy and sensitive and I think he’s the type that calculates every move and likes a whole plan laid out in front of him.

Maybe to him that’d be crazy for me to confess my love. If he was feeling it and feeling like the time was right he would have said it? He hasn’t so it makes me believe maybe he doesn’t think it’s appropriate yet?

I wonder if I do tell him and I get a sad reaction how it would affect me. Maybe I wouldn’t be able to handle it? But on the other hand, I feel like he should know.

[Hooo!]

Well I thought this was rather obvious regarding my post but then: I suggest that :

you do talk enough and together about what you want your future to be like.
Also if you don't know where he stands or what he feels you can start paying attention to the emotional state of your partner by listening to what and how he sais things. You can also start telling simple feelings (like why you are happy( or xyz) when xy with him.