Where should I be looking then?

[CleanCut]

Sorry to hear about your daughter's situation WiltedRose, that does sound very tough and I hope it somehow gets better for you both soon.

[WiltedRose]

Aww Thank you!! She is adorable and laughs and smiles very often and I do get a lot of support or I wouldn't cope & it probably explains why I'm so crackers!

[CleanCut]

Aww Thank you!! She is adorable and laughs and smiles very often and I do get a lot of support or I wouldn't cope & it probably explains why I'm so crackers!

Glad you two have good support.

Last Independence day, the girl I was dating invited me to her family's BBQ and we had a wonderful time, then later that night we went to my place for the night for a great intimate evening. Just wish I was dating someone right now so I could at least have someone to cuddle up to watch some fireworks or something...

[WiltedRose]

And Next Independence Day could be another story chin up Hun!

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I met my ex Husband 25 years ago today lol so it did mean something to me once! He actually texted me happy Anniversary as a joke so I could have been celebrating 25 years but he's a Tit so that's put pay to that 8)

[CleanCut]

Cool, congrats on that! I really have never felt more balanced and happy than when I was in those short relationships, so I will continue to pursue finding a girl as best as I can.

The online dating world has not been treating me well lately, so I do feel that I need to work on keeping an open eye out when out in general public. I probably miss of lot of opportunities by simply overlooking certain girls or situations.

In fact, case and point, there is this one phlebotomist at the hospital I met a few times that is pretty cute. I'll be getting yet another blood drawing this Wednesday and if she is there again, maybe I'll chat her up and find out if she is single or not.

[WiltedRose]

You've Miss read my last post read again x it's my ex Husband I met 25 years ago but we're divorced although we are still friends for the children's sake

I was with my ex boyfriend 9 months but broke up nearly 2 months ago.


And yes do speak to her speak to lots of women to induce your confidence

[CleanCut]

Ah, ok. Thanks for the info...

Well, the girl I wanted to chat up wasn't there today, of course, my anti-luck streak strikes again...

[TheEvilJester]

OMG!!! Have you guys ever heard about the law of attraction? What you constantly think about and dwell upon will come to you. The universe gives you what you think about. So, if you constantly think about how lonely you are and there is no one there for you, that is what the universe will give you. Stop thinking about what you don't have and don't want and start thinking about what you desire and deserve. TheEvilJester, you sound like Eeyore. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. CleanCut, what you have had to endure is not easy, but there are literally millions of women out there. How about eHarmony or Match.com? Please read about the Law of Attraction. It will really open your eyes and make total sense.

Well, I for one definitely appreciate the thought. Believe me, I do agree with this TO A CERTAIN DEGREE. By that, I mean the world just doesn't work this way, sadly. It isn't like you can just decide "You know what, I'm going to find love" and that means it will happen. Believe me, I actually HAVE tried that. I've actually, on a few occasions, hit a point where I was done being alone, done being lonely, and decided I would make it happen. ...The thing is it only ever made it hurt all the worse when I was still left alone.

So, just for me personally, I've found it just makes sense to accept my fate even if part of me may never fully accept it. At least that way I can find some kind of happiness, rather than constantly fighting what seems inevitable. Also, I've tried online dating and, in my personal experience, it is just a joke. And, believe me, save all the advice people always offer when you say that about how maybe you are doing something wrong on the online dating sites. I've heard all that advice, I've used it, it doesn't change anything for me. I still recommend to anybody who is thinking about it that you definitely SHOULD try online dating, though. I just think you should do it expecting that the result will be as pointless as mine. I figure, that way you aren't too disappointed if nothing comes of it, but the maybe you will be pleasantly surprised if it does.

I don't feel sorry for myself, though. It is hard to explain. I think part of me has always felt it is the fate I deserve anyway, it's just that part of me has always fought that. So, I don't feel sorry for myself, per se. I merely aspire to a better life. Or at least I did.

CleanCut,

I know it sounds so weird for me to say all that about myself and yet see hope for you... but hey, I have huge double standards against myself. I DO still believe in true love. I do believe you can find it. As always, I am so sorry for what you have had to go through. But, that doesn't mean you have to go without love. Hell, the fact that you even continue to battle your health issues in an attempt to get better shows an amazing strength in you, and that is something that can attract people. I know it must be hard to see that now, but in time you will feel better.

If and when your treatment is done, your hair will likely grow back. That may help you feel more confident, but you don't even need hair for that. Heck, these days I choose to shave my head completely bald. I actually think I look much better that way. I know your lack of hair wasn't your choice, but you can do other things that are. A new wardrobe that makes you feel awesome.... some fun hobbies that help you feel some positivity in life. Anything that makes you feel better being you. That can be the best time and place to find love when it is found engaging in something you enjoy even if love had no part in it.

Good luck to you, friend.

[pcmaster]

Stop jerking off [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION] and you will find GF in no time.

[CleanCut]

Thanks [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION] , always good to hear from you on here. Yea as far as the hair situation goes, it's definitely not going to grow back in the affected area, which is about 70% of my head unfortunately, but I really don't care anymore and I'm actually starting to almost like the shaved bald look on myself, so should be ok there.

[TheEvilJester]

Stop jerking off [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION] and you will find GF in no time.

LOL! I always get a chuckle out of this advice from you, PC. I mean that as a compliment, by the way. A) I really don't think whether or not somebody is taking care of themselves regularly in this way would effect their likelihood of finding love one way or the other. B) Wouldn't the opposite actually be more true? I would think if one were to stop relieving this biological need it would make them MORE likely to be desperate for release so they'd be LESS likely to find a real relationship. Personally, I am not looking just to "get it in" so to speak. I want a real relationship. I mean, obviously I'd rather have love AND have sex.... but if I had to choose one, I'd choose love in a heartbeat. Without hesitation, I'd choose having true love without ever getting to have sex over always getting to have sex but never finding true love. That is an EXTREMELY hypothetical situation, of course. True love SHOULD mean you are both also sexually compatible, so it should involve sex as well. I'm just speaking hypothetically.

Thanks [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION] , always good to hear from you on here. Yea as far as the hair situation goes, it's definitely not going to grow back in the affected area, which is about 70% of my head, but I really don't care anymore and I'm actually starting to almost like like the shaved bald look on myself, so should be ok there.

There you go, bro! Some women dig the bald look. Honestly, it can look very good. Like I said, I think I look MUCH better with my head shaved than I did with hair. You could even accessorize it if you want. Maybe with some hats, maybe grow a beard. Whatever makes you like your look all that much. You know one thing women and men both love? Confidence. Believe me, I of all people know how hard confidence can be for some of us to feel.... but you can kind of "fake it 'til you make it." In other words, do stuff that makes you feel a little better about yourself. Then, carry yourself as though you have confidence. In time, it will be easier to actually FEEL that confidence.

You rock, bro! Maybe you don't feel it right now, so let us say it for you. You are awesome! Believe that and you will feel it in time... and others will see it. Don't get me wrong. I'm not suggesting becoming a cocky jerk. BIG difference between confidence and cocky. None of us are God's gift to the world.... but we're pretty damn awesome! Any gal would be lucky to have you, CleanCut.

[pcmaster]

[MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION]
Relationship can grow from sex. Like a lot of people have sex in early dates and then after more sex feelings can hit them and thats where relationship can happen. I know you want love but these days love often comes after sex for most people, sex is like easyest part and girls ussualy get attached sooner to guys from sex. And not jerking off would force you to seek contact with girls and try to date them and make you interested in sex more. And when theres love then sex just gets better. You need to balance these two things Jester, cause girls dont just want love but they want sex too. Otherwise you should be looking at christian girls.

I heard this love song today, guy is singing to a girl. Translated from russian - "Who made you like that? Everyone is fcking you but Im kissing you."

[MENTION=69470]CleanCut[/MENTION] Thing about bald head is that smart girls wont mind it. Only shallow stupid girls will comment on it or find it as turnoff. So you need a girl who understands and accepts diferences, who understands that everyone have differences in looks and pretty big ones. Its not about how you look but what you do. Talkative personality can compensate the artificial things. Its the energy that attracts girls.

[WiltedRose]

I would take love over the other any day and I loooooovvvvveee the other ;p

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But then I'll be back here moaning and taking PC'c advice haha!!!


Seriously though my first relationship lasted 21years!! We had 3 children and our sex drives were sometimes hit and miss and on a couple of occasions we did nearly separate but in the end we were both on par with that but the love had died long before

[lovebroken]

I think it might be better not to look at all right now for you, because you seem burned out from trying and maybe while not looking people will start coming out of the woodwork for you. Like they say a watched pot never boils. Take up a new hobby and think of other things for the summer. Then start fresh come fall.

[CleanCut]

I think it might be better not to look at all right now for you, because you seem burned out from trying and maybe while not looking people will start coming out of the woodwork for you. Like they say a watched pot never boils. Take up a new hobby and think of other things for the summer. Then start fresh come fall.

Did that for most my life and nothing happened, which contributed to why my first ever date was at the age of 29. I can't do nothing again or for sure nothing will happen...