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Thread: Longing to be loved

  1. #211
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    I see. I dont wanna be used as icecram delivery boy and thats egocentered.
    Those jokes I wrote only on forum, not the type of the guy to say them in real life.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  2. #212
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    i don't want to insult you.
    It's just that you have issues and I'm trying to help.
    Multiple parts of your posts have led me to conclude you are egocentered
    You interact out of your own perspective.

    Example: you fear that you are being downgraded as an iceman (but u like to buy flowers)
    Instead of asking her favourite flavour and just bring some.
    If you don't want to make her make you then you could still ask for something small in return. Or what she will get you both.
    If we were to meet in Riga and it was a hot day I'd probably pick up some ice cream for us too

    You bring the flowers for you- not for her. (You cannot because you do not know who she is)

    The whole niceness is a big problem
    I have googled an article for you here
    http://www.themodernman.com/blog/why-does-being-too-nice-to-a-woman-often-lead-to-rejection.html
    If you think I am insulting you with my post or bashing you: You do not get the point.
    I am not here to insult or bash anyone. I offer up my free time to help. Take from my post what is useful to you.
    If you are angry about my post or myself, then please stop and think how that happened. Usually that is the way the brain responds if a critical belief system is challenged (its called cognitive dissonance). If you have trouble with it please answer in the thread. I will come back to you.

  3. #213
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    Thanks [MENTION=85121]Hooo![/MENTION] Thats a good article. I felt that being nice is not enough. This explains why.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  4. #214
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    In Germany we have a saying: nice is the little brother of pillock
    If you think I am insulting you with my post or bashing you: You do not get the point.
    I am not here to insult or bash anyone. I offer up my free time to help. Take from my post what is useful to you.
    If you are angry about my post or myself, then please stop and think how that happened. Usually that is the way the brain responds if a critical belief system is challenged (its called cognitive dissonance). If you have trouble with it please answer in the thread. I will come back to you.

  5. #215
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    Update: My mom went to Russia for 2 weeks and I started to feel lonely. Its a day one alone so today Im trowing in party in my flat. Invited two friends and shouted social media for girls in case some want to join. Will have a lot of fruit flavour beer and snacks.
    The girl I tried to meet like half a year went to live in UK now. Feel kinda wasted cause there was so many chances to meet and talk but I never did. Hope she will come back soon or at least that time there will be well spend. Sex on drugs ! Ha ha.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  6. #216
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    Something happened. Yesterday I went to bed and took my phone and noticed that 5 hours ago third girl was messaging me and she texted- "Hi How are you doing?" I couldnt believe my eyes and wanted to ask for what its been such a honour. Then I answered and she said that she mistaken to wrong number. I said thanks for writting at least by mistake. And she asked how I am doing and we started to chat then I said that I been thinking how everything ended between us and that I understood many things, that I was brutaly honest till point of rudeness and egocentric, also I understood that she didnt liked me that much. But she said that she liked me and still does just she couldnt understand few things. She said that she dont understand how guy dont have drivers license and that I always wanted to spend time in room, not go out. I defended myself but she still havent replied. We texted till late night yesterday and now its moorning 9 AM so will see if she will reply.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  7. #217
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    So she havent replied but what you think about it guys? [MENTION=71386]TheEvilJester[/MENTION] [MENTION=85121]Hooo![/MENTION] Should I take her back after everything? I posted our last texts before breaking up in previous post - post 189
    Last edited by pcmaster; 06-06-17 at 06:59 PM.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  8. #218
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    I'm noticing I got WAY behind in this thread, so I'm not 100% sure what you are referring to here. But, I'm thinking you meant the girl who told you that you talk about sex too much?

    If so, then I think you'd be best just to forget her and move on. I can't really comment on whether I agree that you talk too much about sex or if maybe she's overly prudish because I didn't see the part where you described the conversation or your typical interactions with her. But, whether you do talk about it more than maybe you should, or whether she is just overly sensitive and you didn't really talk about it all that much.... either way it still sounds like you two probably aren't the right match.

    I mean, it isn't like your views on sex/your sex drives have to be an EXACT match for things to work.... but they should at least be close enough. If you two are THAT far off then it seems unlikely that would ever work.

  9. #219
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    Easy way would be just to give up. But today was hot summer and something happened. I had idea that we could go swim together. I mean fck all that happened and sex stuff. Really could just meet for coffee and walk and then next time maybe go for a swim. I mean I been watching this YT vid - how to get your ex back in 10 steps. And it said like start off friendly.

    What really worries me that she said she dont understand how guy dont have drivers license. Im planning to get my license only after 2 years so if thats so important to her then we could break up again over it. Just really dont know, just want GF for the summer, not picky, besides when we broke up my mum said we should come back together.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  10. #220
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    Women usually rationalize feelings
    Meaning they don't feel well with you for some unconscious reason. What they tell you is that it is because of X (drivers license or whatever) which is almost never really the problem

    They feel something is wrong. They notice something wrong
    They connect those with causality
    However very often (and not only with women) two sentences linked with "because" are not linked causally
    If you think I am insulting you with my post or bashing you: You do not get the point.
    I am not here to insult or bash anyone. I offer up my free time to help. Take from my post what is useful to you.
    If you are angry about my post or myself, then please stop and think how that happened. Usually that is the way the brain responds if a critical belief system is challenged (its called cognitive dissonance). If you have trouble with it please answer in the thread. I will come back to you.

  11. #221
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    Thanks for reply Hooo. Today I was reading sex therapist stories about couples and I had idea that maybe I didnt care about her emotional needs enough. I mean we had great time together while kissing and making out but we never talked much and didnt had much quality time together. Perhaps she wanted to feel more comfortable with me and do things together besides bedroom action. Its like we spoke different love languages - for her quality time was important but for me being close with our bodies.

    Yeah Hooo I felt that what she says is not the case why we broke up. There was something deeper, something more.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  12. #222
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    If you **** up usually it's not the thing that ends it that's the reason. That is just the tip of the iceberg
    Its like not the virus is the problem. It's just the symptom or the result. The problem is earlier that you should perhaps have installed anti virus software up front or you should not have downloaded from insecure sources or ...
    fixing the virus while continuing (old attitudes/ behaviour) to download insecure stuff without antivirus software will only get you so far...

  13. #223
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    Kinda nervous before date on monday. Planed to get coffee at Caif Cafe and go for a walk but that place in shopping mall no longer exist so will get coffee in other place in shopping mall. In that place you have to make your own coffee. So its nice we could make coffee for ourselves, something to do together.

    I want to talk a lot and ask her questions, hoping it will go well and I wont lose speech.

    Theres one girl at work as well. Shes younger than me in fact too young for me or my taste in girls, but shes been looking at me with these sexual predator eyes. You know how shark brain look right? If no then google it I think her shark brain is kicking in. Its party could be my fault because I never say Hi to her or any other girls at work besides I congratulated only her at womans day when we guys had to give girls(every girl) bottle of champagne at work. Anyway in case i end up alone at Chrismas then I will consider to ask her on a work Xmas prom.

    Back to topic. Monday is coming and hope girl wont pull out before date. Wonder if she will wear a lot of makeup like on a first date. I want to look good for sure.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  14. #224
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    So update. The girl is dead. Whn time came she messaged me and said that she have a little changed plans. Shes selling car and two guys was going to see her. At the same time we should have been meeting. So I was angry and wrote - "How you wish. Do whats more important to you." It still hurt, took few days to get over it. I really gave her a lot of chances but she trowed those chances away. This is not special girl but i really been good to her. much better than she was to me.

    Anyway now messaging with new girl. This is girl number 4 so gona call her fourth girl. Hope she will become fourth. So far havent met her yet but this is first day we really been messaging besides she said she have a lot of work today so will finish later. Anyway have big plans for summer. Want to do stuff together with girl, like swimming and surfing.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  15. #225
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    New girl I been chatting to died too. After joke that headache means there will be no sex(She told me she have a headache). Anyway we chatted for good 2 days and I came to realize that girls who works mental work is not for me as they are too smart. I prefer simple girls with who you can talk shit. Girls who works with their hands not brain. Think that would be more suited for me as Im only factory worker with no high school education for now. Still planning to start studying this summer.

    Anyway today was nice. I saw people enjoying summer to the full as always a lot of marriages happens in summer and saw one marriage today too. Also people riding sub boards on water and riding water bikes, playing voleyball and swimming, riding cycles, sunbathing and eating ice cream outside. Besides im on day 20 without PMO(porn masturbation orgasm) Planning to hold on all summer and then longer. Found this today and it sure will help a lot - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/in-case-you-didnt-know.84619/#post-678626

    Anyway today I did something I wanted to for a long time - theres a girl who repaired my phone two times for free. And today I bought her a rose and bring it to phone shop where she works. She didnt remember me but its been a good few months since she helped last, besides they have hundrets of people every day. I was like - Good day, this is for You - and gave her rose. She looked confused at first and asked for what. Then I said that she repaired my phone twice and that I was already thinking I will need new phone. And she started smiling and looked very happy and wished that my phone will last for a long time.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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