Firstly I am admitting to being a complete jerk and have no excuse for what I did. I have never done this before and don't plan on every doing it again.
I don't even know why I did it and regretted it instantly.
Last night me and my wife for the first time a long while managed to get into our own bed without our 1 1/2 year old being in our bed. We don't have a very exciting or regular sex life, (sex once in 3 months).
We got in bed and just layer there. Then my partner said "if you want to we can, bt have to be quick incase she wakes up!", I said ofcourse I want to as we never get intimate together.
I turned over and started to kiss her on the lips, after a couple of kisses she said "don't kiss me too much I have a soar throat", so I moved down onto her knock to start kissing that, again a couple of kisses she then said "don't kiss me you have whiskers, it's not very nice".
Ok, so I moved further down to her breasts, (she had a tank top on and a bra) so I tried to stroke inside her bra and kiss her breasts, she then said "stop I don't want you stretching my bra, and I don't like my breasts being played with", so I decided to move further down instead.
Started kissing her over her stomach, she then said "don't touch my stomach", so moved down between her legs... Started kissing inside her thighs and around her to get her in the mood... She said "Stop, your making my legs itch".
Ok so I'll go straight I'm, so I started going down her and touching her intimate area. (not even 5 minutes) she says "put a condom on, so your not faffing around when I'm ready to go"
Put one on and went to go back down on her and throught I'd get a vibratory out to help turn her on, so got one out and used in on her externally... Not even a minute before she said "Stop it just come on and let's start"
I said well I need a little help to get hard as till this time she haven't touched me once. She then just grabbed it and started yanking it. I then continued to rub her to keep her in the mood, I then said "can you play with my balls aswell to help. me get hard"? So she just grabbed then and pulled then really hard (hurt).
After a minute I was hard so moved her legs and waist to the edge of the bed so I could get into a comfortable position. I entered her amd started to get a rhythm and she kept moving her legs into different positions meaning I couldn't move comfortable inside her.
I then lifted her legs upto so her feet was either side of my head, and pulled her in closer and started increasing my thrusts and speed into her... This got me thrusting really quick and hard, really fast.
(This is where I am a total prat, and regret everything)
She said "I don't like this", I then lent over her so her legs were going towards her head and I got more over her and started really thrusting, I said "You like it really deep don't you" really pounding her! This was 10 seconds me ontop. She then shouted stop stop stop, I didn't stop for at least 3/4 seconds until I realised what I was doing. Then stopped immediately.
She then jumped off the bed crying and I was trying to apologise.
I honestly don't know why or what happened. As above I have never done this type of thing and never plan on doing it again. I'm a very caring person, this wasn't me. We have always been very gentle in the bedroom, so for me to do this, I don't even know why?
I want to make it up to her but how, what can I do to say sorry for that.
My head is a mess from this.
Please help