About Mr.R
So there is this guy I dated while I was in high school (he was 7 yrs older than I), and our relationship lasted about 3 months... but after he was obsessed with me. I don't mean that he was stalking me or wouldn't stop messaging, but he moved away because his friends wanted him to stop talking about me, he bought a house & nice car to impress me, and he's basically been single since waiting for me.. for 6 years, and finally gave up and has been dating a women whom he lives with along with her daughter and a pet. I did not know of any of it.
About Mr. Dreamy
Well I've been dating a man for 5 years who I love deeply, but it feels that the love is not reciprocated. He has tried to end our relationship a a couple of months ago while drunk, he has told be that he's scared of me ever being a mother, he doesn't mesh with my family nor I his, he constantly makes jokes implying that I'm dumb, and he's addicted to porn/sex & occassionally makes eyes with other women in front of me. Besides that he is very handsome, is really good with his finances, has supported me through school, he's handy around to house, he's considerate (eg. He will make me dinner or do something nice when I'm having a bad day), he has been forgiving to some of my own mistakes, and overall I want to say that the good out weighs the bad.
He's never says he is ready for marraige (until I change), he never does anything significant during special days such as anniversaries, when I tell him that the relationship isn't working well he sort of shrugs, and overall I feel that he has no real desire for me.
The one week:
Well this past week my birthday passed, and again Mr.Dreamy didn't go out of his way to make me feel special... But then I get a text from Mr.R. I was so desperate for being desired that I was vulnerable. We talked and it quickly went from 0 to 100. He was telling me that I was the love of his life, he wants to get married, wants me to live with him, etc etc. Ridiculously and foolishly I responded back similarly, not because I really felt it.. but because I convinced myself that being loved/ adored by Mr.R is better than loving Mr.Dreamy and not feeling desired. This weekend I even started preparing to move out.
Last minute
Mr.R left his spouse even though I basically begged him not to and told him I will not do the same because I was going to give my relationship with Mr.Dreamy a shot. Mr.Rs obsession with me is scary, and really unhealthy. Now once he was finally moving on and met someone new he destroyed it just for the chance that I might reciprocate. He's such a good guy and I feel like I destroyed him. What do I do? How can I live with that.
And what do I say to Mr.Dreamy. I never physically met up with Mr.R as he lives far away, but I have been emotionally reckless. Do I tell Mr.Dreamy what about how ive behaved and severely damage our relationship?
He may even find out from other people about it... my whole family knows & friends of friends are mutual between Mr.Dreamy & Mr.R. I'm sure Mr.R has told everyone.
Any advice would be extremely appreciated