Giving Up:(

[Jsnowman]

Hey guys, I'm giving up on my ex. Four months have gone by since our 5 year relationship ended. We talk about once every week or so, more in the beginning. But recently i've been the one doing most of the calling. A week ago I asked her if I could come for a visit since she lives in Indiana, me in Chicago. She said it was fine but could not narrow down a date. She started a new job and it requires her to travel Sun-fri. It doesn't leave her a lot of time to take care of her usual activities except on the weekends when she is home. Initially she told me maybe the weekend of the 24th but if not then, maybe two weeks later. I talked to her yesterday and now it seems that it may not be until after July. I feel like i'm being strung along. Maybe she doesn't want to hurt my feelings and hopes I'll get the picture. Well, if that's the case I'm seeing the writing on the walls. I've decided to stop calling her. I haven't really moved on but I think now it's time. I was hoping for a meeting to see if there was any spark left but I don't think she really wants to see me even if she says she does.
So my question is this. Next time she calls, do I let her know that I'm moving on and perhaps it's best if she doesn't call me anymore or do I just go about my business and move on without announcing it to her? We definately do not hate each other and we care for each other deeply. I'm clueless here....what do you all think?
Thanks

[misombra]

you guys broke up. get on with your life my friend.

[shh!]

If you really and truly are moving on (and I think you should), what difference does it make whether or not you tell her? Your actions will speak louder than words, anyway...

[Jsnowman]

Good points guys. When you're wanting something so bad sometimes, you tend to try and rationalize a situation when in fact there is nothing to rationalize. I worry though, that eventually she will call because I will not have called her in awhile and she will probably wonder why I haven't been calling. What then? What do you say?

[spartacus]

You dont say anything... just chat... ask her how she is, whats shes been doing, listen to her... ask about her life etc, and the things that are important to her...

You'll probably end up the best of friends that way and who knows what the furture holds...

[Jsnowman]

Thanks spartacus. That's what I've been pretty much doing everytime we talk. She doesn't ask too much about me but I listen to her. She's got a lot going on in her life in terms of work but taht's about it. I asked her if she was seeing anyone not too long ago and she said no. She asked me if I was an I replied the same. It's hard to talk to her and not want to tell her how I feel. I've pretty much done that though. I've got to give up. I've got to move on. Dwelling on this has done nothing for me. What else can I do.