So let me be just straight forward to get over this anxiety. The guy I like is three years younger than I, maybe even four years younger than I. The thing is we both like each other, but I'm turning 18 and he's still a minor. Should I honestly just drop in dating him? I know it's illegal, in fact it's strange for a woman to date someone younger than her age, at least that's why society portrays it. I don't think he'll wait four years to be legal to date me. Is our relationship worthless to even give it a shot?
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Thread: Too old for him?
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08-10-15, 08:08 PM #1
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Too old for him?
Last edited by Risa-K; 08-10-15 at 08:11 PM.
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08-10-15, 08:32 PM #2
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I don't think it's practical to pursue a relationship with that kind of age disparity at this time.
Pain is what the world does to you, suffering is what you do to yourself. Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.
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08-10-15, 08:35 PM #3
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That's what I thought as well.
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09-10-15, 02:10 AM #4
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At 26 and 22, it would be reasonable. But not while he's still a child
Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.
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09-10-15, 08:42 AM #5
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Agreed. I know that number is just a number, so on the surface it almost seems like it shouldn't matter. However, 18 and 14 is a big difference. If we were talking about 30 and 26, 32 and 28, 26 and 22 (as basil said) or something along those lines.... Yeah, then that is different. In that case, a number is just a number and as long as you two are at similar stages of life and are happy together, who cares? Heck, even if you were 32 and 23, 22, something like that, I'd say as long as you two want similar things out of life at the time and are happy, then age is just a number.
But, 18 is just starting to become an adult (even though you really are just learning to be an adult for years to come) whereas 14 is still fully a child. Oh, at 14 you THINK you're an adult, but you don't even know the meaning of the word yet. Add to that the unfortunate potential legal issues of the relationship, and it would probably just be better not to pursue it. I know that kind of stinks, but there are a lot of reasons why the age difference at this time in your life just makes it not such a good idea.Last edited by TheEvilJester; 09-10-15 at 08:45 AM.
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09-10-15, 08:58 AM #6
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Thanks again guys for enlightening me with thoughts that are unbiased. I appreciate your honest answers
Busting my way to college and might as well find a man there lol.
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09-10-15, 01:42 PM #7
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Think it would be even illegal if you were 16 but hes 14. Anyway good luck with everything.
Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will
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09-10-15, 07:57 PM #8
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Depends on the state. Some have strict 18+ only laws, some have 16 as the age of consent, and some have Romeo and Juliet Laws.
Originally Posted by pcmaster
But seriously, you're 18? Find an older guy who knows how to treat you right. Not some pipsqueak who makes the wrong moves in even his wildest wet dreams.Laissez les bons temps rouler!
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10-10-15, 08:10 AM #9
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I agree with SuperHappyTime on that. If you were both 14 it would be a different story, but at 14 nobody really knows how to properly be in, maintain, and appreciate a relationship. That's not even really meant as a slight against him. It's just, at that age you don't really understand love. Emotionally, you are most likely at very different stages, hence why 14 and 18 would probably wind up feeling like a HUGE difference, even though maybe 5 or so years down the road, the same age difference (only 4 years) will feel like nothing.
For now, yeah, focus on guys your age. You never know. Maybe years down the road when you are both adults, fate will actually see fit to bring you together. At this stage in your life, though, I would agree that the time is just not right. Good luck to you!
