I think I'm making a fool of myself....

[indigosoul]

the response I got: "you look at this whole situation. you like me and want to date. you know i am at the point that i'm pretty much happy single. now factor in is it easier/will it make you happier to forget about it and move on or do you think there is a good possibility you can sway my ideology. you look at it, decide which is the best root for you and then follow that decision. You know how persuasive you can be and you know how stern i am in my views." So I asked him if he thought I could persuade him and he said: "I have no clue if you could. you might be able to, you might not."

He's not just a jerk, he's an insensitive, bitter jerk. He's either been seriously burnt, is in love with someone else, or is completely lacking empathy. RUN AWAY!! "Sway HIS ideology??" A mature person understands that commitment comes from within, not externally. This guy will mind-f*ck you ROYALLY, if you stay. Believe it, I know the type.... a man that loves you (or is even considering it) would NEVER say this kind of thing.

Guys, am i right???

[misombra]

i'm a girl but yes i'd say that's exactly right.

[Tone]

Yes Indigo is right!

[icecreamISgood]

Wow, I hate it when people play mind games like that. I'm in a little bit of a similar situation, and I know how much it hurts... and the thing is, yeah you can ask for advice from people, but no one really knows the whole story.

For example, they don't hear the "good" stuff like, how he acts so sweet around you & does nice things for you ... b/c usually when people ask for advice it's about the bad stuff.

Anyways, usually, my advice would be "just move on" and "he sounds like a jerk" ... but I know that it is not that easy to do, especially when you are getting mixed signals from him.

I think you should go with your gut feeling. Just remember you're not alone with this, there are lots of us in the same situation, and it sucks... I hope it all works out good for you!

[China]

Wow, I hate it when people play mind games like that. I'm in a little bit of a similar situation, and I know how much it hurts... and the thing is, yeah you can ask for advice from people, but no one really knows the whole story.

For example, they don't hear the "good" stuff like, how he acts so sweet around you & does nice things for you ... b/c usually when people ask for advice it's about the bad stuff.

Anyways, usually, my advice would be "just move on" and "he sounds like a jerk" ... but I know that it is not that easy to do, especially when you are getting mixed signals from him.

I think you should go with your gut feeling. Just remember you're not alone with this, there are lots of us in the same situation, and it sucks... I hope it all works out good for you!

The weird thing is, I'm not sure if I *AM* getting mixed signals. I think I am but everyone else close to me who knows about the situation tells me that he really isn't sending mixed signals, that he's been very clear about what he does/doesn't want. BUT, like you said, when we're alone, it can be nice. He can be very sweet and then I blink and suddenly he's not talking and very moody. Things run very hot and cold with him and he says that that's just how he is...sometimes he needs to just be alone and he "disappears" for a few days. And then if I ask if everything is ok he tells me they are and i need to stop overanalyzing things.....I'm so confused.....

[China]

Ok, so Jay and Anne got into it yesterday. Anne believes that one of us is lying to her about our whereabouts a few weeks ago and is REALLY pissed. Jay and I continue to see/talk to each other every day. He and I aren't sure what to do about the situation. No matter what we do it's bad and right now I believe that my relationship with her is unsalvageable. Things are becoming strained between Jay and myself and the whole situation is just bad. Not sure what kind of advice I"m looking for, I think I just needed to vent.