Am I misreading her signals? Is she interested?

[reyzer100387]

Hi,

I apologize in advance for this long story. I am 27 years old and the girl in question is a sweet, beautiful 26 year old.

We met in the elevator of our apartment block. Our cars park in the same basement. We would casually chat until one day I asked her name, then we spoke for a quite a few minutes and I told her that I was moving out – she seemed sad to hear that. For the life of me I don’t know why I never asked for her number.
Anyway, a week later, just before I could move out I went to her flat to ask her out. She was not at home and her car was out. The next morning I see a note on my windscreen with her number, saying that we should meet up some time. I contacted her thereafter but she was out of town for 2 weeks and said we should meet up when she’s back (by this time I had moved out).

We only met 6 weeks later, as she was busy. I even messaged her prior to that and told her don’t bother as it’s clear I am pestering her and she’s not interested. She responds and profusely apologizes saying it’s all her fault and that she is really busy but wants to meet.

We did eventually meet at a bar (6 weeks later), with some other random people who were friends of her friends. The conversation went very well, but somewhere during the night I ended up talking to some of the other random people while she was talking one of the guys. Nevertheless it seemed like a standard hangout night with a group of people. The next day I messaged her and say I had a nice time, she says likewise and asks if I feel better knowing that she’s 26 (as I thought she was 20 – she looks young).

After that I was out of town for a few weeks with work but we chatted quite often. I sent her pictures of my travels and she mentioned that I have to take her there. When I returned home, we went out to a bar – just the two of us – some 10 weeks after she left me that note. She told me that she said to her friends that she finally met a nice guy in the apartment and now he’s moving out (referring to me). She mentioned how she was waiting for me to ask for her number but I never did hence she left the note. The night went well; we talked, laughed, teased etc. She asked me if I’m an ass man or boobs man, among other things. She also mentioned that just because she talks to other guys it doesn’t mean infidelity, and that was something her previous boyfriends did not understand. She likes talking and socialising with all types of people – exactly like me.

Eventually the bar closed and there were no places nearby so she said that we should go to my place and continue drinking, which I agreed on. Then I remembered that I had no alcohol so I told her so and said I would stop somewhere and get alcohol. She said no problem. We took a taxi to get the drinks and then go to my place, but before getting back she said she’s tired and asked if it’s ok if I drop her home. So I got the taxi to do so.
She apologized the next day, saying she was very tired. I said it’s cool. We continued to chat over the next few days. I tried to arrange for us to meet but she was busy during the week. When I tried to meet with her on the Friday after, she said that she had a girls’ night out and therefore could not make it. She then calls me at 3:00am that morning to chat.

The next day I call her to continue our chat, which goes well. She agrees to meet me for breakfast but then cancels as she was too hung-over.
A week later she contacts me to meet for drinks and asks me to bring my friends along as she would be there with some female friends. We meet at the bar and we chat for while before she goes back to her friends and I go back to mine. Later in the evening she’s talking to some other guy who approached her at her table. I then accept that she’s not interested. Later on she approaches me to chat and I ask her if she’s interested in that other guy because I’m interested in her (which I thought was obvious by now). Well she says she’s not interested in that other guy, but that her life is a bit complicated right now and I respond by saying its cool.

Even later that night she tells me that she told the guy that she’s not interested in him, because she’s interested in me (she was stone sober, while I was not). That guy actually tells me later in the night that she brushed him off and said it’s because she’s interested in me.
Me and her continue to chat for the rest of the night, and thereafter she leaves with her friends. The next day she says she had a nice time and asked me what my friends thought of her. I said they said she was cool.

That was in December. She then went home for the holidays, but we have chatted during that time. She eventually called me two Friday's ago to meet but I was tied up at another event and I could not see her (although I desperately wanted to).

I contacted her last Monday (via text) to try and setup a meet to discuss stuff. She says that she cannot meet as she is out of town this past weekend.

She then tries to explain that she is generally very busy and that she is so used to being alone that it is difficult for her to make time for others. The next day I message her and say that I got the hint a long time ago and I just want to meet for drink and to sort of move on.
She responds last Wednesday: “So you wanna meet for a drink coz you think I am not interested and you want to move on. Hmm… clearly you know so much about me then. More than I know myself :-p”

I respond on Thursday explaining that I wanted to meet to tell her that I am interested in her but over time I started to realise that maybe she was not interested in me. I also tell her that her last message (quoted above) makes me think that she may be interested but I cannot be sure as its “written in a language that only women can understand”.

She responds saying “hhahahahaha, you are hilarious”. She thereafter states that she just got home, and is gonna grab something to eat. We will chat after.
That was last week Thursday. I have not received a response or chatted to her since then.

In summary:
She leaves her number on my windscreen, but takes 6 weeks to go out with me, and it was with a group of others. Thereafter, when just the two of us do go out, she asks me to take her back to my place for drinks, but eventually bails out. She tells me how she was waiting for me to ask for her number, and she tells her friends about me. Then, in December she arranges to meet with me because she won’t see me during the festive season. Now that she’s back from holidays we have chatted but have not met. I eventually come clean via text telling her I am interested, and she seems to cryptically hint that she is also. But no chatting thereafter.

I cannot stop thinking about this girl…

Please offer some advice/comments/criticism/suggestions

Thank you.
Rey

[smackie9]

Well to start off your passive/aggressiveness isn't making you so desirable. It's a sign of weakness. You don't have enough confidence in yourself to just tell her to see you, instead you send these messages "Oh lets meet so I can have closure....." what the f is that? it's lame!

Girls that blow hot and cold are testing you due to some insecurity issues. So here's a link that might give you a better understanding on what is going on....you can take it from there on what to do. [url=http://www.sosuave.com/halloffame/hall305.htm]Why Women Test Men[/url]

[reyzer100387]

Thanks very much for the response Smackie... you are 100% right about my (lack of) confidence.

However I did mention that I messaged her and told her that I am interested in her but she did not respond. Your link to how women test men states that I can wait 3 days and contact her or NOT AT ALL as the ball is in her court and I must show that I am not needy and insecure.

What do you suggest? - contact her now that 3 days have passed or just leave it for her to contact me.

[HadleyK]

looks like she is interested

[pcmaster]

I think contact her first and be sure what you want from her. Dont wait for something to happen but know beforehand what you want to happen.

Hope you will find girl thats more easier than this one.