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Thread: Sex and affection

  1. #1
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    Sex and affection

    Hi, 3 months ago I met what I thought was the most amazing girl ever, she was everything I could have wished for. Smart, sexy, funny, affectionate and very loving. She made me feel a million dollars, always text me, emailed me nice things, told me I was gorgeous, always affectionate and the sex was amazing. After about a month-month and a half I started noticing that these things were all going down, it's now at a point where the most i get called is babe, I always feel like I have to make the first move if I want a kiss or a hug, kissing just consists of pecks rather than snogs, and sex has gone completely to once ever week at absolute best. I have questioned her dozens of times now, she insists there is nothing wrong and that she just isn't an affectionate person and she doesn't have a high sex drive. If this is the case why did she sell herself as being like that at the start? I've tried to tell her that it bothers me and te fact she's not interested in sex bothers me and makes me feel like she doesn't find me attractive but nothing seems to change. It's almost like she has no regard for my feelings whatsoever.

    What do I do?

  2. #2
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    Maybe thats it. Honey moon is over and she is showing her real face.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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    Breakup with her duh.

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    Its called Bait and Switch: First she baited the line then she caught you and now that she has you she's switched to who she really is.

    If at the three month mark she's acting like she's a-sexual you should just leave. It will only get worse like worse as in once a week to once a month IF YOU'RE LUCKY.

    Yea.. break up with her.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    But what if it is just how she is? Could I be throwing away something good?

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    There is nothing good about this. Why would you sacrifice your expectations just to be with someone....it's asinine.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Seriously can't possibly be that desperate. Down the road you will be so starved for physical love you will end up regretting it when you do meet someone that does fulfill your expectations and possible cheat on her anyways. Don't do this to yourself. Move the f on.

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    Quote Originally Posted by azza84 View Post
    But what if it is just how she is? Could I be throwing away something good?
    It's thinking like that ^^^ that has the divorce rate as high as it is.

    You ARE NOT HAPPY with the way she is so how could that possibly be "something good?"
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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    But I have asked her time and time again to just be honest if there is problems or any change to her feelings, and I have made it point blank clear that we can go our separate ways if she ain't into it. She insists there's no problems and she loves me. All she want is to just be content and get on.

    I wonder if it's anything to do with her past, she has had bad abusive relationships both physically and mentally, and she had a miscarriage last year. Plus she lost her mum to cancer a couple of years ago, which still affects her greatly. We started chatting to each other literally a week after she split from her ex.

    Could this be to do with it?

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    Think she might not be over her ex when she met you. If so then she could fall in love with you cause her heart wasn't available. You know all that affection could be just an act. Maybe she just don't wanna be alone thats why shes with you.

    This is all just a guess. I'm not saying she don't love you. Just you have do decide whether this "love" is enough for you or not.
    Last edited by pcmaster; 25-12-14 at 12:26 AM.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

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    So where do I go from here? I've gave her is many opportunities to be straight and honest with me but she insists there's no problems

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    If her feelings are gone, you can either try to bring those feelings back or the 2 of you could just move on with your lives. You'll have to make a choice on what you want to do.

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    She is just selfishly settling just to be in a relationship.....she is just using you. Don't believe a word she says, it's all a ploy to keep you around. Tip: Go by their actions, not what they tell you. Words are easy, people lie, stop being a fool.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by azza84 View Post
    But I have asked her time and time again to just be honest if there is problems or any change to her feelings, and I have made it point blank clear that we can go our separate ways if she ain't into it. She insists there's no problems and she loves me. All she want is to just be content and get on.

    I wonder if it's anything to do with her past, she has had bad abusive relationships both physically and mentally, and she had a miscarriage last year. Plus she lost her mum to cancer a couple of years ago, which still affects her greatly. We started chatting to each other literally a week after she split from her ex.

    Could this be to do with it?
    Are you going to keep on about her until you read a post that tells you what you want to hear? YOU ARE NOT HAPPY WITH HER LACK OF LUST FOR YOU. That WILL NOT get any better with time. That is the bottom line and you need to either shut up and put up or leave and find someone who you can be happy with in ALL ways.
    “The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” ~Joan Didion

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