Why should I initiate foreplay all the time?

[Riff88]

I am in a very loving relationship. She is 43, and I am 35 years-old. We’ve been together for a year. We’ve had a rough ride the past year, sorting out our differences and baggage, which were ample.

We’re now at a stage were we are comfortable with each other, our communication has improved greatly, and we are more respectful towards each other and our differences. We’re crazy about each other, and love is VERY MUCH all around us.

But we have one problem. When it comes to making love, she wants me to initiate foreplay, “90% of the time”, as she puts it. The past year I’ve done mostly just that. I would always be the one to kick things off. She would rarely lean over, and start kissing me, or caressing me etc. On occasion (once very two months, she would put some effort in, but that’s that.) We make love 2/3 times per week.

Quite frankly, I don’t think it is right that I should commence foreplay all the time. She thinks it is. I’m really tired of it, and have been starting to show less interest in our sex life.

I would like to hear some opinions of the ladies on this forum, please.

[pcmaster]

Womens like sex but they want it to be guys idea. She want to be wanted and desired. But yeah I agree she should invest more.

Basically shes too old for you. 20 year old might have more of what you want in sex life.

[michelle23]

Shes 43 so when she was young, women were thought to be conservative.. like "its a mas job to initiate sex". I get its frustrating but at least shes not saying no or rejecting you. It could be a lot worse. I know some couples in there 20's who rarely have sex at all and theres plenty your age who don't either. You have a loving relationship and your having regular sex. You could try asking her to initiate a little more-tell her it would turn you on and she may try but shes likely just shy and doesn't know how to demand. A year is not that long either, it should get better in time as she starts to feel more comfortable but you should let her know now you would appreciate some initiative from her