Asked best friend out, got a NO & can't stand the situation

[Yoavk]

My best friend and I are really close, I did so much for her and she did for me. We had 2 major fights where we didn't talk to each other for a month afterwards but came out of it much stronger and better than before. I idolized her since the moment I met her but she had a boyfriend back home (long-distance relationship) for a long time. She broke up with him and started dating this guy who cheated on her 3 weeks in. Couple of days ago I strepped on a pair and told her I wanna take her out, to see if we can be something more, and that she's the greatest girl I've even met and she said she's flattered but she doesn't want to date now someone she knows but to try new people outside our circle of friends. She did ask that we'll act as if it never happened and continue to be great friends. We still text and talk and laugh with each other but I just can't stand it, I can't take her out of my head, I met this other girl last night and couldn't get myself to do anything with her because I was thinking about my friend the entire time. I think about her when I wake up and when I go to sleep, and I just can't do it anymore. I'm thinking about calling her, and telling her that I can't get her our of my head, and that I wanna know exactly the reason why she doesn't want to try - if it's because she's not attracted to me or because of some other reason, and to tell her that I think we should stay apart for a while until I get these feelings flushed out, but I'm scared to lose her for good. What should I do?

[Archie]

As someone who's been in your shoes, the best and only way is to pick a razor up and remove her from your life, like you would remove a tumor from your foot.
For as long as she'll be close to you, you will never get her off your mind. I bet you feel happy and fulfilled while you're together with her, but that's an illusion, cause you're not together you are both worlds apart. After you part ways, you return to your cold and dark life without her, as if she was the sun illuminating and warming your world.
You are a friend to her and she'll always see you as one, someone who is "safe" to be around with.
Tell her that it's over and move on. You will feel terrible, but it's a path to a better future, trust me on this.

[Yoavk]

As someone who's been in your shoes, the best and only way is to pick a razor up and remove her from your life, like you would remove a tumor from your foot.
For as long as she'll be close to you, you will never get her off your mind. I bet you feel happy and fulfilled while you're together with her, but that's an illusion, cause you're not together you are both worlds apart. After you part ways, you return to your cold and dark life without her, as if she was the sun illuminating and warming your world.
You are a friend to her and she'll always see you as one, someone who is "safe" to be around with.
Tell her that it's over and move on. You will feel terrible, but it's a path to a better future, trust me on this.

Thank you for the quick reply.
I can't cut ties with her without explaining it to her first, because when we finished talking she asked if we'll be ok and as before from now on and I told her I think so but only time would tell. Now, for instance, we're going to meet with our group of friends and she asked me via text if I wanna go together cause we live nearby from one another.

I didn't tell her before I'm in love with her or that I have a crush on her, I just said I think she's the most amazing girl I've gotten to meet and I wanna see what we feel if we go on a date. Should I tell her now that I can't stop thinking about her and I think it would be best if we drifted apart for a while so I can get these feelings out? I have to tell her something, I can't just stop talking to her completely alltogether because we're hanging out with the same group of friends on a regular almost-daily basis and we're almost together in all of our courses in uni. Maybe if I tell her that I can't get her out of my head and I think it would be best if we get some distance from each other cause I dont wanna hurt myself, she will change her mind? or would she just be freaked out and get a safe distance from me anyway on her own because she'll be scared I'm falling for her every time we talk or every time she touches me?

[Archie]

Then talk to her about it.
The reason she doesn't want to date someone from her circle, is because if they broke up, one would have to leave the circle and she's afraid of that.
I had to burn bridges to many of my acquaintances when I cut ties with the girl I was killing myself over, so this could suck..

I can't tell you what to do, so if you're alright with the situation as it is, then pay no mind and go on living the way you have been. If you want to change something and go all-in, ask her out and what happens happens. If you want to cut ties without risk, start communicating with her less, start distancing yourself, You might need to build a wall she could not get through.
It's to to you.

[Yoavk]

Thing is, we're doing pretty well in the 3 days that passed since I told her what I told her, and she's trying really hard to make sure that we're still good friends by texting me and talking to me and laughing etc.

Do you think there's any chance if I tell her the whole story and how much I really want her (which I didn't at all when I asked her out), she'll rethink it? or maybe the thought of losing me as a friend because I wanna distance myself from her, would also make her think that it's worth giving it a shot?

I do understand what you're saying about her being scared that it's gonna get awkward later within the group, but I told her I just want one date, and if afterwards she or I feel it's not "that", then we go back to being friends just like before, and no one even has to know about this one time.

[Wakeup]

You should STOP being afraid to lose her for good because frankly, that would be the best thing that could happen to you. Being held an emotional prisoner to her is stagnating you from finding a real nice girl that will want to be your girlfriend. Someone who will reciprocate your feelings back to you and make you much more happier then you'd ever be settling to be some chick's emotional tampon.

Go zero contact and stop being her MALE girlfriend. It will be THE BEST THING YOU EVER DID FOR YOUR DATING FUTURE.